


The Selkie's Gift

by jenorama



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-27
Updated: 2017-04-02
Packaged: 2018-10-11 17:31:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 40,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10470342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenorama/pseuds/jenorama
Summary: Six years after the events of "California Dreamin'", Harry and Ginny have settled into their lives together and it's time to start a family.





	1. Chapter 1

I looked out onto the sparkling blue waters of the bay, sweeping wind-tousled hair behind one ear as the sailboat scudded along on the water. Turning my head, I watched as Harry and Teddy hurried to obey Artemis’s shouted instructions, quickly raising the mainsail and setting the boom. With a loud crack, the sail caught the wind and billowed out, the small sailboat immediately picking up speed and pressing me back against my seat.

Teddy stood in the bow, too-long sandy hair swept back by the wind, one hand holding securely to the rigging as the boat bounced in the swell of the bay. Harry sat down next to me, looking utterly windblown and happy as he kissed my cheek. “All right?” he asked over the sound of the rushing wind.

“Yes,” I said, nodding at Teddy. “He’s going to ask you for his own boat one of these days.”

“Hm, I might ask myself for one,” Harry smiled, teeth white in his tanned face. After a few years here, he looked like he’d lived in California his entire life. 

“It’s a good thing that I don’t get seasick then.” I leaned forward and drew his face down to mine for a soft kiss. 

“Oh goodness,” Diana said as she came up from the galley, awkwardly balancing a tray with several wineglasses. Harry sprang up and took the tray from her, setting it on the deck. “Thank you. I haven’t got my sea legs yet. Here.” She handed him another tray, this one full of different cheeses, fruit and assorted crackers.

With a teenager’s unerring sense for food, Teddy plopped down on the deck next to the tray, inhaling several pieces of cheese and half a bunch of grapes. “Where are we going?” he asked when he finally paused to take a breath.

“Out to the Farallons and back,” Artemis said from his station at the wheel. “Keep your eyes peeled; we might see some great white sharks!”

“So no swimming, all right?” Harry said, earning a teenaged roll of the eyes from our godson. 

“Duh, Harry. It’s too cold.” 

“And when has that stopped you?” Harry asked, sipping his wine.

“That’s surfing and besides, I have a wetsuit.” The two of them continued grumbling back and forth and I smiled, sipping from my own wineglass as Diana settled down next to me. 

“Those two,” she said fondly as they continued to argue.

“Yeah. Neither one of them can stand for the other to have the last word,” I said as Teddy gave a disgusted snort and retreated back to the bow of the boat, pointedly turning his back on Harry.

Shaking his head, Harry joined Artemis at the wheel and I turned my attention back out to the water. The Golden Gate Bridge loomed closer and closer, reminding me of the enormous stone figures in that Fellowship movie. “So, how has your second year of residency been treating you?” Diana asked, bringing me out of my reverie.

“Oh, it’s been very hectic but not as bad as the first year. I thought I had seen it all at St Mungo’s, but I’m learning that Muggles can be very creative when it comes to injuring themselves,” I said warmly, thinking about a few recent incidents.

“I understand the shifts can be very long and tiring,” Diana said with a sympathetic look, shifting her eyes to Harry momentarily.

“They certainly can. Sometimes I’d be gone for two solid days and then sleep for another two days when I got home. The first year you’re a bit like an indentured servant and it’s only slightly less so in the second year when the new first-year residents come in.” 

“That must have been a difficult adjustment for the both of you, being newlyweds.”

“Well, we weren’t exactly newlyweds by then, thank goodness!” Suddenly conscious of it, I turned my wedding ring around my finger, automatically looking for the glint of gold on Harry’s left hand. 

“That’s true, I suppose,” she said with a conspiratorial grin and I felt a flash of heat rise to my face as I thought back to the early months of our marriage. I’d thought that nothing much would change since we’d been living together for more than a year by then, but I found that actually being married to Harry had made things different in subtle ways I hadn’t quite expected.

Casting my eyes toward him again, I felt my heart skip a beat at the sight of him standing with his hands on the wheel, listening carefully to Artemis as he coached him past another sailboat. He’d long lost the look of an overworked Auror and stood straight and tall, t-shirt plastered to his body by the wind. He saw me looking at him and stuck his tongue out, making me laugh. So often in my mind’s eye I saw him as the boy I’d fallen in love with and I had to remind myself that he would be thirty-two soon.

_And I’ll be thirty-one,_ I thought, sticking my tongue out back at him. 

“Have you given any thought to starting a family?” Diana asked, intruding on my thoughts of my husband.

“Have you been talking to my mum?” I asked with a grin, laughing when the other woman flushed. “We haven’t really discussed it. I’ve been so busy with school and now the residency that the timing hasn’t really seemed right just yet.” I looked toward the bow where Teddy was leaning much too far forward for my taste. “Besides, we’ve had Teddy with us since he started at St Ambrose’s, so we’re not exactly lonely.” 

“Teddy!” Harry barked from the stern. “Back it up, yeah? I’m not fishing you out!” Groaning that Harry was no fair, Teddy theatrically threw himself down on the deck and lay on his back, taking off his shirt to use as a pillow as he took advantage of the sun. His hair cycled through the colors of the rainbow until he finally settled on a blue that matched the water around us.

We passed under the Golden Gate and out into the open water of the Pacific Ocean. Artemis took the wheel back from Harry so he came and sat back down next to me, putting an arm around my shoulders. “Did you have fun steering the boat?” I asked, snuggling into his warmth. The wind was fiercer beyond the protection of the bay.

“It’s a ketch, love,” Harry said, nuzzling my neck and giving me a shiver that had nothing to do with the colder air.

“Isn’t a ketch a kind of boat?”

“Well, yes—”

“Then I rest my case.”

“Weasleys,” Harry said, rolling his eyes as he picked up his glass of wine. 

We spent the rest of the afternoon sailing around the rocky islands, looking for whales and sharks. Teddy was the first one to spot a whale’s spout, shouting, “Thar she blows!” in his best pirate voice. After that first one, it seemed there were whales everywhere and we were even treated to a couple of them jumping up into the open air and slapping back down onto the water with thunderous booming sounds. 

“Oh! Look over there! A shark!” Teddy yelled, pointing as he leaned far over the starboard railing, causing Harry to grab the back of his shorts before he fell into the water. 

I looked and saw the fin cutting through the water like a knife. I grinned at Harry and shouted, “We’re going to need a bigger boat!” earning a groan from both him and Teddy.

“Ginny, that’s terrible,” Teddy admonished, turning his attention back to the shark swimming quickly away from them. 

As Artemis expertly guided the boat around the rocky islands, I saw an island that looked like it was awash in seals of several different kinds. Their incessant barks carried over the water, making me think of Marella and Rònan. _I wonder how they’re doing? I wonder if they’ve had any more pups?_ Harry kept me updated on Moira Langston and her brother Morgan, neither of whom seemed to bear him any ill will for his part in the disappearance of their nanny, but I hadn’t really thought of Marella in years.

I remembered the words the selkie had said to me on China Beach. _If there is ever a time ye have need of me, get to yonder rock or the ruins and call my name and I’ll come, aye?_ I shook my head as we turned for home. _I still have no idea what I would have need of her for._

Once back in the sheltered waters of the bay past the Golden Gate, Artemis let Teddy take the wheel for a while, much to the boy’s delight. “Avast, ye scurvy dogs! Take cover for it’s Dread Pirate Teddy comin’ for ye!” he shouted lustily, waving an imaginary cutlass. 

“Dread Pirate Teddy?” I asked Harry, raising an eyebrow at him. “Doesn’t have quite the same ring as Dread Pirate Roberts.”

“What else possibly could?” Harry responded, giving me a smile that set my heart to fluttering in my chest. 

That night, when it was just the two of us again, I thought about Diana’s question. Ever since we were married, I’d been getting that same question from my mother, Fleur, Sarah, my brothers and even from Hermione. 

“Did you hear what Mum said tonight?” I’d complained to Ron one evening last year when we were at Grimmauld Place. “She started in with all of that ‘when I was your age’ business!” I looked at my brother as he gently patted baby Rose’s back. “It’s no fair, you and Hermione are off the hook.” I held out my hands and he carefully passed the baby to me. I nestled her sleepy weight against my own shoulder, rubbing her back to get her to burp. 

“Well, to be fair, things were different back then, yeah?” Ron said reasonably. “Everyone had been going through a tough time and I guess they figured they’d better be getting on with things. Get the next generation going.”

“I suppose,” I said, not really agreeing with Ron. Someday, I’d have to ask Mum what drove them to have such a large family, but that wasn’t a conversation I felt comfortable with just yet. Rose finally burped and I looked down at the baby’s sweet face. I loved all of my nieces and nephews, but so far hadn’t felt the need to have a baby myself.

But now as I lay in the dim bedroom with Harry next to me, I kept turning over Diana’s question in my mind. _I have one year of my residency left. If we start soon, I’ll be done with it by the time I’m due and then I can take my time and decide what I want to do next._ I smiled at the thought of Vijay Malhotra’s constant entreaties to come work for him at SF Thaumaturgical. _He would be over the moon if I finally took him up on his offer._

Seized by a feeling of excited possibility, I turned on my side and looked at Harry, boyish in repose despite the gray at his temples. Prodded by that sixth sense of his, he opened his eyes and squinted at me. “What?” he asked, voice rough with sleep.

“I love you,” I said, leaning in to kiss him.

“Love you, too,” he mumbled, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close. 

_It’s going to be a busy summer,_ I thought as I lay in the circle of his embrace. _Maybe we’ll start after the summer holidays._

For the next few days, I kept my decision to myself, feeling almost like I was keeping a secret for a friend. “Girl, what is going on with you?” Ben asked as we grabbed a hasty lunch one afternoon. 

“What? Going on how?” I asked, nonplussed.

“You, you’re just … I don’t know, like you got a little bit of sumthin’ sumthin’ going on, you know?” he said, waving his hands at me. “Like you know something the rest of us don’t.”

“Well, you know that’s always true,” I said with a mischievous smile. “I always know something you don’t know.”

“Ugh, give it a rest, Samantha,” he said, twitching his nose at me. He’d been so proud when he could finally do it just like Elizabeth Montgomery in that old TV show that I’d almost baked him a cake. “Are you and Harry trying something new?”

“Now you give it a rest,” I said, gathering up the detritus from lunch. _Not yet, we’re not._

***  
“Harry, can you put toothpaste on the list?” Ginny called from the bathroom, her words garbled by the toothbrush that was undoubtedly in her mouth.

“Yeah.” I picked up my wand from my bedside table and gave it a flick, muttering, “Toothpaste,” under my breath.

A moment later, she came into the bedroom and sat on the bed, smelling minty fresh. “Harry,” she said, “I want to start trying for a baby.”

“You want to what?” I asked, not sure I had heard her correctly.

“I want to start trying for a baby,” she said, confirming that I had indeed heard her correctly.

My mind went blank and I simply stared back at her, struggling to process her words as she sat and looked patiently back at me, waiting for me to catch up to her. I put the book I was reading face down on my chest. “Right now?” I asked, sounding incredibly stupid even to myself.

“No, not right this minute,” she said, smiling at me and ruffling my hair. The mellow light from the bedside lamps made her look utterly amazing and I once again thanked my lucky stars that I’d managed to get her to marry me.

“Um,” I began, sitting up in the bed and clearing my throat, “when?”

“Well, we’ve got a busy summer planned, so I was thinking once things settle down and you and Teddy are back at school.” She leaned in to kiss me and whispered in my ear, “I don’t want to ruin any of our summer fun with morning sickness.” Picking up the book, she marked the page and leaned over me to set it on the bedside table, her breasts brushing against my bare chest.

She took her time, placing the book with exaggerated care, bringing most of her upper body in contact with mine, setting my pulse pounding in my ears. I sat up, gently pushing her onto her back as she squeaked in surprise. Now it was my turn to spread myself all over her and I did so with abandon, kissing her everywhere I could reach. 

Her hands were warm on my shoulders and she moved her head to one side, presenting me with the enticing column of her throat. I pressed my lips to her fluttering pulse, imagining I could feel the strong beat of her heart resonating with my own. Her small sighs and gasps still had the power to make me feel like I was eighteen and desperately trying to figure out what she liked; every sound she made letting me know I’d done the right thing. 

Afterwards, as we lay tangled up together, she sighed and put her lips next to my ear. “That was an excellent practice session,” she purred, her low voice making my skin tingle. 

“I’m so glad you think so,” I whispered back, darting my tongue out to her shoulder, tasting the sweat of our efforts on her skin. I’m most definitely not eighteen anymore, but the feeling of her warm body next to mine had its own kind of magic and before too long, I was the one flat on my back and she was the one using my sounds as her guide.

Later, sated and heavy with sleep, my thoughts continued to whirl in my head. Before Ginny, the only real thought I’d given to a family was not accidentally starting one. As I thought about it, I realized that I’d just kind of always assumed that a family would appear one day, like in Teddy’s bloody Pokémon game. _Come on, Potter. You’re old enough to know that children don’t appear out of nowhere,_ I chided myself as I settled more comfortably next to her and gave myself up to sleep.

***  
The summer passed in a blur of hospital shifts interspersed by trips to the mountains to camp and hike and to the beach to lay on the sand and surf. Harry and Teddy had both recently discovered kiteboarding, trying to outdo each other with daredevil flips high in the air that left my heart in my throat. I preferred my own board to stay in contact with the water and reserved my flying for when I had a broom underneath me.

“I wish you wouldn’t do that,” I said when Harry flopped down on the blanket next to me one afternoon after a particularly high-flying session. He had the top half of his wetsuit peeled down and was still breathing hard from his exertions. 

“Do what?” he asked, sitting up on one elbow.

“That,” I said, waving my hand at the others out on the water, skating across the waves like manic water bugs. Teddy was still out there and as I watched, he used an incoming wave and the power of the wind to hurl his lanky body at least thirty feet into the air, executing a backwards flip with a howl of delight that was clearly audible over the crashing of the waves. 

“Why not?” He sat up and squeezed some of the water out of his hair, looking at me with a genuinely quizzical look on his face.

“What if you get hurt?”

“I happen to know an excellent Healer,” he said, reaching for my hand. When I moved it away from his grasp, he frowned. “What’s wrong?”

What _was_ wrong? I’d never ever told him not to do something before. I’d cheered him on or joined him in things the average person, Muggle or wizard, would consider insane. But since I’d been thinking of starting a family, flinging oneself up into the air with only thin fabric and wind to slow one’s fall seemed foolhardy in the extreme. I shrugged and looked away, not sure how to voice my concerns without sounding like a killjoy. 

Teddy proved an able distraction as he sailed to the edge of the water, shouting for Harry to come help him get detached from the board. He gave me his “we’ll talk later” look and jogged over to help the struggling boy, the both of them immediately moving into one-up mode as they compared stunts. 

The rest of the afternoon wasn’t exactly awkward, but there was a definite undercurrent that Teddy picked up on, eventually abandoning us for a group of kids his own age. I watched him laughing with the other boys as they tried their level best to impress the girls, all the while aware of Harry pretending to read next to me.

“Are you going out again?” I asked, keeping my eyes on the waves.

“Nah, I thought I’d stay here with you,” he said, his tone carefully casual. 

Inwardly frustrated with my attitude and my sudden inability to allow Harry to be himself, I stuffed myself into my own wetsuit and went to commune with the waves. After catching a few subpar ones, I sat astride my board, rolling up and down with the swells as I waited for my perfect wave. Looking back toward the beach, I saw Harry paddling out to me on his own board. Pulling even with me, he sat up, straddling his board and holding out his hand, a question in his eyes. I took it and he squeezed mine hard, the look of relief on his face making my heart thump. 

“All right?” he asked quietly.

“Yeah.” I let go of his hand and turned to look back out to sea, eyes scanning the horizon. 

“That looks promising,” I heard him murmur and I agreed as I watched the wave barrel toward us, forming that perfect curl that all surfers love and wait for. “Shall we ride it in together?”

I turned to him as I positioned my body flat on the board, ready to catch the wave I’ve been waiting for and gave him a daring grin. “Only if you think you can keep up,” I said, paddling fiercely as the swell of the incoming wave shot me forward.

***  
“First day of school,” Ginny said as she tightened my blue-and-gold tie. “Nervous?”

“Nah, more excited. All of those fresh faces, dreams just waiting to be crushed,” I said with a silly grin, kissing her on the tip of her nose.

Out in the kitchen, I heard the kettle start to whistle and I hurried out to take it off the burner, nearly tripping over the cat in the process. Teddy sat at the bar, tapping away at the phone Gin and I had gotten him for his fourteenth birthday in April. Stuart jumped up on the bar and Teddy absentmindedly broke off a piece of bacon for him. 

I poured the hot water into the waiting mugs, dunking the teabags several times to try and hurry them along. “First day of school,” Ginny sang as she came out of the bedroom. She was wearing my favorite scrubs, the ones with little owls all over, and kissed Teddy on the cheek. “Sophomore this year! Don’t be too hard on the Freshmen!”

“Ginny,” Teddy admonished, not quite wiping her kiss off his cheek, “don’t you think I’m getting too old for this sort of thing?”

“For what? Kisses on the cheek from your godmother?” She raised her eyebrows at him and quick as a flash, grabbed his face, planting lightning-fast kisses all over his cheek and the side of his head, reducing the aloof teenager to a giggling boy in seconds. I hid my smile in my cup of tea as she came around and picked up her own mug, adding milk and sugar as she preferred. 

Teenaged aloofness recovered, Teddy resumed tapping at his phone, the bleeps and bloops indicating that he was having an intense conversation with someone or several someones, even though his face belied no trace of it. He suddenly gave a short bark of laughter and stood up. “I’m going to head off. I’ve got to meet Duncan and the others so we can go over our class schedules.”

“All right,” I said, fully aware that “go over class schedules” meant “check out the girls and boast about our summers”. “I’ll see you in class, yeah?”

He grunted an inarticulate response and bent to pick up his school bag. “Let me look at you,” Ginny said, moving to stand in front of him. He bore her attention good-naturedly as she fixed his hair, straightened his tie and brushed the lint off his blazer. As I watched them, I realized that Teddy now topped her by more than half a head. He’s going to be taller than me, I thought, maybe as tall as Ron.

“Am I good enough to go now, Ginny?” he asked when she finally stepped back.

“Yes,” she said and I thought I saw a sheen of tears in her eyes.

“Finally.” In a move that surprised the both of us, he dipped his head down and planted his own quick kiss on her cheek. “See you tonight.” In seconds, he was whisked away by the Floo, leaving a cloud of soot and powder in his wake.

Setting down my mug, I hugged Ginny from behind. “You okay?” I murmured, kissing the top of her head.

“Yeah. He’s just growing up so fast.” She sighed and turned to face me, putting her arms around my neck, her warm brown eyes looking into mine. “So, school has started again.”

“It has.” I sneaked a look at my watch. Teddy’s leaving had reminded me that I needed to get going myself.

“And I’ve started my third year of residency.”

“Hopefully along with a less crazy schedule,” I said, realizing that she was backing me into the worktop.

“I think things have settled down enough, don’t you?” she asked, giving me a slow smile and pressing her body against mine.

“For what?” I asked, genuinely nonplussed.

“For what?” she echoed, brows drawing down in consternation. “What did we talk about in July?” Oh. I didn’t want to tell her that I had forgotten, but after that time on the beach, I sort of had. My face must have given me away, though, because she let me go and turned away, rinsing our empty mugs in the sink and shooing Stuart away from the leftovers on Teddy’s plate. 

“Sorry,” I said sheepishly, putting my hands on her shoulders. “Been a busy summer, yeah?”

“Do you still want to?” she asked quietly, still not looking at me.

Her question gave me pause. Did I? My heart beat faster and I already knew the answer. “Yeah, I do.”

She turned to face me, her beautiful smile lighting up her face. “Then let’s start tonight.”

I felt like something had short-circuited in my brain and all I could do was stare at her for several seconds before I managed to swallow and mumble, “All right.”

She shook her head at me and went up on her tiptoes, delivering a scorching kiss before pulling back. “That’ll give you something to think about,” she said with that Cheshire Cat grin of hers.

Desperately hoping I wouldn’t splinch myself, I Apparated to work, that kiss still tingling on my lips. The first day back is always hectic with learning new names and re-acquainting myself with the quirks and behaviors of recurring students and I had a job of it with Ginny’s promise ringing in my ears. 

Juanita noticed my distraction at lunch when I sat staring off into space as she chatted to me about her summer trip to her father’s village in Nigeria. “Harry, are you okay?” she asked with a frown when I’d failed to respond to one of her questions.

“Hm, oh yeah. No, I’m fine,” I said, embarrassed to be caught woolgathering.

“What’s going on in there?” She waved her finger at my forehead and I shook my head.

“Just thinking about the upcoming school year. Lots to do,” I said, even though that had been the furthest thing from my mind. In my mind, I had been newly sixteen and suffering through _The Talk_ with Mr Weasley and Ron in Mr Weasley’s garden shed. 

It wasn’t Mr Weasley’s fault; he was an old hand at it having been through it with Bill, Charlie, Percy and the Terrible Two. The problem was Ron and me being utterly unable to control our embarrassment as we shifted around on the uncomfortable stools while Mr Weasley held forth on the thoughts and feelings that we’d no doubt begun experiencing. When he got to kissing, I nearly broke and ran out, memories of kissing Cho battering my brain to pieces. 

“Now, I am going to teach you something very important,” he said, taking out his wand. He proceeded to tell us, in excruciating detail, exactly how babies are made. And he wasn’t coy about it—none of this “when a mummy and daddy really love each other” nonsense—he was precise and while he didn’t use overly-clinical language, he definitely got his point across. I glanced at Ron and saw his mouth was hanging open, mind clearly blown. 

“And now that you know _how_ babies come about, here is what you must do to prevent one.” Ron and I leaned forward, concentrating on learning this most essential of all magic as he showed us the incantation and wand movement. I knew right then that I wouldn’t rest until I could cast this spell wandlessly.

“That’s it?” Ron asked after Mr Weasley had made us practice it a few times. “What exactly does it do?”

“It kills off all of your little swimmers,” Mr Weasley said garrulously, pointing his wand at his son’s crotch. Ron quickly put his knees together in defense. “It renders them completely unable to fertilize a woman’s egg.”

“Uh …” Ron began, frowning in concentration. “So … nothing comes out?” I breathed a sigh of relief, grateful that he’d asked the very question that had been on my own tongue. 

Mr Weasley thought this was hilarious and slapped his knee in mirth as Ron turned the brightest shade of red I’d ever seen him turn. “No, something will still ‘come out’,” he said reassuringly once he’d got his laughter under control. “If it’s any consolation, Bill asked the same thing.”

As we left the shed with this new knowledge, a thought occurred to me. Mr and Mrs Weasley must have _wanted_ this enormous, crazy family that I was madly in love with. With that little spell, they could have prevented Bill, Charlie, Percy … probably not Fred and George, those two were indomitable … Ron … Ginny. But they didn’t. They wanted every single one of them. And then I had a thought that literally stopped me in my tracks. My parents. They could have done the same thing, especially living in such dangerous times as they had, but they didn’t. The undeniable proof that I was wanted and not some random occurrence was a revelation.

That night, I was acutely aware of Ginny as we went through the regular everyday tasks of making dinner, eating dinner, and finally cleaning up after dinner. The way she moved easily around me in the kitchen in our well-practiced dance, the sound of her laugh when Teddy told her about his first day back at school. The secret looks she gave me across the table.

“You know, I thought living with a teacher would make school easier,” Teddy grumbled good-naturedly when I nagged him to get a start on his schoolwork. “It’s no fair that you have lunch with Ms Okefor every single day.”

“Yes, and all we do is talk about how much of a slacker you are,” I said as I sat on the sofa, rubbing the aches out of Ginny’s feet. 

Teddy harrumphed and shuffled off to his bedroom, leaving us alone on the sofa with only the cat and the noise of the telly for company. We spent the evening chatting about our days and I found I was having a hard time focusing on the conversation. I felt like a runner in the ready position, waiting for the crack of the starting gun. 

Finally, it was ten o’clock and Ginny rose from the sofa to prod Teddy to get ready for bed, holding out her hand for his phone and plugging it into the charging station in the kitchen. To be completely fair, we had to put ours away for the night as well and I had an alarm trap set that would silently alert us if any of the devices were tampered with before seven o’clock in the morning.

Feeling at loose ends, I decided I’d get ready for bed myself and took my time brushing my teeth, using the opportunity to examine myself in the mirror. Usually I looked at myself just enough to make sure I wasn’t going to embarrass anyone when I stepped outside, but this time I really looked. Six years in California had given me a year-round tan, making my green eyes stand out even more. I’d started going gray during all of that Horcrux business a few years ago and I wasn’t completely convinced that had nothing to do with it. Ginny soothed my ego about it by saying that she found the gray at my temples very distinguished and sexy.

Shirtless, I took a quick look around to make sure I was alone and I struck a few poses, pleased to see that running, yoga and keeping up with Teddy had kept me in shape. “Oh, very pretty, Potter,” came Ginny’s voice from the doorway and I nearly jumped with surprise, her laughter giving me a hot flush.

“You weren’t supposed to see that,” I mumbled as she continued to giggle.

“Aw, come on.” She came all the way into the bathroom and hugged me. “You are the least vain man I know. It’s good to see that you’re just like the rest of us. Besides, you’re hardly an old, done man.”

“The gray gets me sometimes,” I said, self-consciously sweeping a hand through my eternally unruly hair.

“You don’t have any gray anywhere else,” she said, sweeping her hand over the hair on my chest. “Oh. It seems I stand corrected.” I looked down and sighed at the single gray chest hair that rested in the tangle of black. “Perhaps I need to conduct a thorough survey?” Her hand slid slowly down my chest and stomach, coming to rest squarely on my crotch. 

“Hmph, only if I can do the same for you,” I said, bending to kiss her, the touch of her lips combined with her hand on my cock bringing me completely erect. In what seemed like seconds, we were on the bed and she was under me, brown eyes looking into mine with complete trust and I hesitated.

“What’s wrong?” she whispered, legs tightening around my hips.

“I’ve never …” I began, fighting to get the words past the abrupt constriction in my chest. “I’ve never … consciously … _not_ done the spell.”

A look of understanding dawned in her eyes and she nodded, stroking my cheek with her thumb. “I know, love.” And she did know, knew all about the witches who’d tried to make a fast Galleon with their claims that I’d gotten them pregnant. “Tonight doesn’t have to be about that, all right? We can just have fun.”

I looked down at her and even though her face didn’t betray a single sign, I knew how much that had cost her. I knew that once she’d made a decision to do or have something, she didn’t let anything get in her way; her hummingbird tattoo was ample evidence that even I couldn’t stop her. Pushing aside my own uncertainty, I kissed her, feeling her breath explode into my mouth as I slid slowly into her. 

***  
September bled away in a never-ending stream of patients, leaving me exhausted and longing for my overworked student days. I had early mornings and late nights and if it hadn’t been for weekends, I’m certain I would have gone mad. Harry and I made the most of those weekends, always saying yes when Teddy asked about spending a night over at a friend’s. 

One early October afternoon I found myself staring into space as I was supposed to making notes for a patient’s discharge. The insistent beeps of an alarm brought me out of my reverie and I settled my stethoscope around my neck, not quite running to the room with the strident alarm, but when I arrived, the nurse on duty had already quieted the alarm and tended to the patient, a sweet old lady in for gallbladder removal.

“Thank you, Carla,” I said, picking up the chart and scanning the latest notes.

“It was no problem. Her pulse oximeter had just slipped off. I taped it on more securely,” she said, adjusting the IV lines. She looked at me and frowned. “Are you okay, Dr Potter? You look a little tired.”

“Well, that’s just part and parcel around here, isn’t it?” I checked my watch. “I don’t have rounds for another hour. I’m going to see if I can catch a nap.” Carla nodded and I headed off to the staff break room and the famously lumpy sofa. 

Thankfully, it was deserted and I laid down on the sofa, putting a smelly pillow over my head to block out some of the light. _Half an hour,_ I told myself, trusting my internal alarm clock to wake me up. _I have been tired … have I been more tired than usual lately? I wonder…_ I thought back to when I’d last had my period, right at the end of August and my heart beat faster. 

I’d expected to go through a few cycles, but it seems Harry and I caught things at just the right time. Now completely energized, I sat up, counting furiously in my head. _Yes, I should have started last week._ “Oh my God,” I said out loud, my voice sounding loud in the empty room. 

After finishing my rounds, I left the hospital instead of sticking around to finish up paperwork, Apparating to my favorite potions supplier. Back home, Harry and Teddy were already home and working on dinner. “How was your day, love?” Harry asked as he stirred the simmering pot of red sauce on the cooker and Teddy industriously chopped Italian sausage.

“It was great!” I said as I set my shopping bags down on the worktop, getting a raised eyebrow from him for my enthusiasm. 

“Good to hear.” He kissed me on the cheek and went back to his sauce. “Teddy, that’s enough sausage. Go ahead and toss it in the pan.” 

“I’m going to go down to the lab, all right? Come get me when dinner’s ready.” I grabbed my potion ingredients and left the apartment, catching sight of Harry’s bemused grin. 

Downstairs in the garage we called our Potions lab, I turned on the overhead lights and set my things down on the worktop. Soon I was busily chopping ingredients while the cauldron heated over the gas burner Harry had installed when we moved in. My headphones were in and I hummed along to “Wake Me Up Before You Go Go” as I carefully measured out water we’d gathered from a free-flowing spring in Calistoga and kept in a five-gallon jug.

Once the water was steaming, but not yet boiling, I carefully added the ingredients and stirred them with a silver rod. Soon, the smell of lilacs filled the garage and I sat down on the stool to wait as it cooked down, setting a timer for when I needed to do the wandwork. 

As I sat there, listening to music and keeping an eye on the cauldron, I tried to gauge how I felt. I thought back to last time, when Harry had come to my flat seeking comfort after killing that man. I’d been so certain that I felt different, that I felt the newness inside of me and I searched for that same feeling again, but I didn’t feel any change. My timer went off and I picked up my wand, waving it in the prescribed motions over the cauldron, nodding in satisfaction when the potion went from dark purple to vermillion. 

“What’s that you’re brewing there?” Harry asked as he shut the door into the lab behind him. 

I looked up at him and smiled. He had a spot of red sauce on the shoulder of his tee shirt, the red standing out starkly against the white. “I’m late,” I said.

“You’re what?” He frowned in puzzlement and then his eyes opened wide in shock. “Already?”

“Maybe. That’s what this is for.” I gestured to the bubbling cauldron and turned off the fire underneath it. 

“What is it?” He came closer and looked into the cauldron, wrinkling his nose at the smell of lilacs. 

“Pregnancy Detecting Potion. I put a few drops of blood in and if it turns clear, I’m pregnant and if it turns cloudy white, I’m not.”

“And you need all of that?”

“No, I made a big batch. It’s good to have on hand. I’ll just need a single vial.” 

“Can you do it now?”

I shook my head. “It needs to cool for twenty-four hours first. I’ll try it tomorrow night.”

“Um, okay then.” Harry stood, looking adorably shy and scratched the back of his neck. “Dinner’s ready.”

“I’ll be right up. I just want to get this covered.” He nodded and stood looking at me. “What?” He grinned and shook his head, grabbing me up in a tight hug, immediately letting me go when I wheezed.

“Oh, God, sorry!” he said, face flaming.

“It’s fine, Harry! You’re not going to hug the baby out of me!” I said, pulling him close. “We’ll know tomorrow, all right?” 

“Yeah.” He kissed the top of my head, whispering, “I love you.”

“Love you too,” I murmured against his neck. We stood like that for a while until I felt his phone buzz in his pocket. 

“Teddy. He wants to know if I got lost getting you,” Harry said with a snort as he read the message. 

“Guess we’d better get up there before he eats everything.” I conjured a cover for the cauldron and shut out the lights, Apparating back up to the apartment.

The next morning, I woke up feeling more energized than I had in weeks and Harry looked at me, utterly bemused as I buzzed around making tea and putting together a quick breakfast for everyone. As I was plating up bacon and eggs, he raised an eyebrow at the song I was humming. “Bruce?” he asked, sipping his tea.

I stopped and realized I’d been humming “Glory Days” and gave him a sunny smile. “Well, he _is_ the Boss,” I said, kissing him on the cheek.

“Gross,” Teddy said, eyes glued to his phone. 

Back in our bedroom, I dug around for a clean scrub top and my hand brushed against the drawer that held the wands we’d had made by old Ollivander himself. _Water horse, selkie and thunderbird. Which one will choose you?_ I thought, resting my hand briefly on my abdomen. 

The morning went by in a whirl of patient rounds and paperwork and I felt like I could tackle twice the workload. I made jokes with the nurses and flirted shamelessly with patients three times my age. Like that old song, I could bring home the bacon _and_ fry it up in a pan. In our staff meeting that afternoon, I sat down next to Ben and he nudged me in the arm. “Look at you, Miss Thing,” he whispered. “What’s gotten into you?”

“I’ll tell you later,” I whispered back as the meeting started. 

An hour later, I wasn’t feeling quite as spectacular as I had been and Ben had noticed, shooting me a concerned look as I shifted around in my seat to try and relieve a burgeoning backache. Finally, the meeting ended and I stood up, feeling an unmistakable whoosh as I did. _No,_ I thought as I momentarily froze in place before gathering up my things. Ignoring Ben’s question, I hotfooted it to the ladies loo as quickly as I could, throwing my papers down to the floor of the stall as I yanked down my scrubs and knickers. 

_So much blood … should there be that much?_ On the toilet, I hunched over, curling in on myself as I felt the onset of what was shaping up to be the worst cramps I’d ever experienced. I felt faint and I forced myself to take deep, slow breaths until that black graininess faded from my vision. _I guess I was just late,_ I told myself as I cleaned up, checking myself in the mirror, using my wand to banish any lingering effects from the short cry I’d had on the toilet. 

Outside, Ben stood in the hallway looking anxious. “Are you all right?” he asked, blue eyes concerned.

I forced myself to give him a wry smile. “Harry tried a new curry recipe last night and I don’t think it quite agreed with me,” I said, pushing out a chuckle.

“Oh, goodness, is that all? You were in there for a while and I was starting to get worried!” We walked down the hallway together, trading hospital gossip and all the while I felt like a mere shell of the amazing, awesome Ginny I’d been that morning.

When I Apparated home that night, Harry was on the sofa, laptop open as he typed earnestly away. He had a pencil in between his teeth and another one stuck behind his ear and he looked up when I silently appeared in the lounge. “Hey, you,” he said, setting his work aside and getting up to wrap me in his strong arms. “What’s wrong?” he asked, looking down at me with a frown.

I shook my head, unable to muster up the energy to tell him what had happened. “I’m going to get a shower. Where’s Teddy?”

“Homework,” he said, allowing me to disengage myself from his embrace. “I saved you a plate.”

“Thanks,” I said, not really feeling the urge to eat. In the shower, I turned up the spray as hot as it would go, watching as blood-tinged water ran across the white shower floor and away down the drain. _It was just stress making me late. Too much work, too much thinking about … other things. Too much pressure, I guess._ I consoled myself with these platitudes, but deep down, I knew I was just fooling myself. I was regular as a clock and always had been. Harry used to joke about setting his watch by me.

Dry again and dressed in my oldest, most comfortable pajamas, I looked at the bed, contemplating just getting into it and pulling the covers over my head, but I knew that was as sure to bring Harry in here as if I’d Summoned him. Gathering my courage, I went back out into the lounge and saw him puttering around in the kitchen, rearranging things that didn’t need rearranging. 

Catching sight of me, he picked up a covered plate and set it on the breakfast bar along with a glass of water and silverware. He removed the cover and revealed a lovely chicken breast drenched in homemade alfredo sauce on a bed of spinach linguini, as fresh as if it had just come off the cooker. The sight of it turned my stomach. 

“That looks lovely, but I had a snack not too long before I left. I’m not hungry tonight, love,” I lied, pushing away from the bar. “I’m going to go down to the lab, all right?”

“All right,” he said after a long pause, re-covering the plate and setting the Preservation charm back on it. “Do you need me to come with you?”

“No. I’ll be fine.” I Apparated silently to the Potions lab we’d set up in the garage, staring at the cooled cauldron. Lifting the lid, I peered at the contents, giving them an experimental stir with the silver rod. The color had turned from vermillion to a rich mossy green; it had come out perfect. I wanted to pour it down the utility sink. Just pour it all down and wash it away, just like the blood in the shower. 

Tears blurred my vision as I stood with my fists clenched, waging a war with myself. _You’ll need it. Those ingredients were expensive. You really shouldn’t waste magic like that._ “Fuck. That. Shit,” I said out loud, the curse words sounding even worse for their rarity. 

“Gin?” I hastily wiped my eyes when I heard Harry’s soft knock on the door, glad he hadn’t Apparated directly into the room.

“Yeah?” I called back, turning to get a rack of empty glass vials from a shelf. As heartbroken as I was, I just couldn’t waste a perfectly good potion.

“Are you all right? Did something happen at work today?” he asked, taking the rack of vials from me and setting them on the worktop.

Despite my fervent wishes, the tears started up again and I screamed inwardly at myself, utterly fed up with this weepiness. Sobbing and hiccuping like a lost child, I leaned my head against his chest as he made soothing noises and rubbed my back. After what seemed like forever, I was finally able to speak again. “I started my period today,” I said, bracing myself for his questions.

He didn’t ask any, though. Didn’t tell me that everything would be fine, that things were hectic and unsettled with him and Teddy resuming their regular schedules and it must have just been the extra stress of that plus entering the third year of my residency where I had to rely more and more on myself and the knowledge I’d worked so hard to gain over the last six years. He didn’t tell me any of the little lies I’d been telling myself all afternoon. The only thing I heard from him was a soft exhalation and a quiet, “Oh.”

We stood like that for a while before I finally broke away from him and turned my attention to decanting the potion into the vials. Respecting my reluctance to talk, Harry helped, securely stoppering the vials and setting the full ones into the wooden rack. I conjured the labels, leaving off the date this time. Cleanup finished, I smiled up at him and took his hand, walking with him up the stairs rather than Apparating back up to the apartment. 

“There you are,” Teddy said, pausing in plundering the refrigerator, “I was getting ready to have a rager of a house party.”

“It’d be the last thing you ever did,” Harry said in an overly-friendly tone. He squeezed my hand and went to join Teddy at the refrigerator. The glass of water was still on the bar and I drank it down, suddenly parched, watching the two of them paw through the freezer, looking for sustenance. 

Teddy grabbed the pint of Chunky Monkey and two spoons, holding one out to me in a question. I took it and he grinned, opening the lid to our mutual vice. “How was work today? Did you save someone from Death’s door? Diagnose anyone with lupus?”

I took a spoonful of ice cream, slowly licking the sweetness from the spoon. “Teddy, you should know better,” I admonished, “it’s never lupus!”

“That’s just on that show,” he said, shoving a huge spoonful in his mouth and going cross-eyed from the immediate brain freeze. “I’m sure someone in that place has it.”

“Well if there is one, I didn’t see them today. I did see someone with situs inversus.” 

Teddy frowned and spooned up another glob of ice cream. “What’s that?” he mumbled around the spoon in his mouth.

“It’s where your major organs are on the opposite side of the body from where they should be,” I said, smiling at his horrified look.

“Wait, what? So his left eye was where his right eye should be?”

“No. Look,” I said, putting my hand on his chest, “your heart is here, right? And when I want to listen to it, I know just where to put my stethoscope.” I thumped the left side of his chest and took the pint back from him. “This bloke came in and his heart is on the right side, so when I put my stethoscope on the left and didn’t hear anything, I was quite surprised!” I fished out my own glob of ice cream and caught Harry’s eye. He inclined his head at the covered dish and I shook my head, content with sharing the ice cream. 

“What did you do when you didn’t hear anything?” he asked, wide-eyed in amazement.

“Well, I obviously knew he wasn’t dead, so I just moved my stethoscope over until I heard something.” I shrugged and handed back the ice cream. “I told him that some warning would have been nice and he didn’t know what I was talking about. He had no idea.”

As we chatted, I felt my melancholy lift. Teddy had inherited his father’s knack for making even the most hopeless of situations seem less so. 

“Okay, kiddo, time for bed,” Harry said, earning a groan from Teddy who passed over his phone. I held out my cheek for his goodnight kiss and he obliged mock grudgingly, shooting Harry a crisp salute. 

In our own room, I nestled into Harry’s arms, finally feeling a measure of peace return to me as we lay quietly. “Are sure you’re all right?” he asked, his voice a low rumble in my ear. 

“I’ll be all right,” I said after a long sigh. “I’m just disappointed.” I looked up at him, running a finger along his stubbly jawline. “How about you?”

He shrugged, eyes closed. “A bit disappointed, too. When you said you were late yesterday, I thought we’d done it already.” He opened his eyes and smiled down at me. “I thought we could go back to having fun.”

My mouth fell open in consternation and I slapped him lightly on the shoulder. “Harry James Potter, are you saying that sex with me is a chore?”

“I would never say that, my love,” he said, nuzzling my neck and nipping the skin lightly. I turned my face up to his, seeking out his soft lips. He held me close in his arms, making me feel safe and loved.

_There’s no hurry,_ I thought as his lips slid over mine and down along my jawline, following the curve down to my neck. _We have plenty of time._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry has an appointment.

I shifted uncomfortably in the waiting room chair, trying to concentrate on the out of date magazine I had in front of me, the words blurring into meaningless gobbledegook. The door opened and I looked up hopefully. “Dexter Burns?” the mediwitch called and I sighed, lowering my eyes to the magazine once more.

My leg had begun to bounce up and down again when the mediwitch appeared once more. “Harry Potter?” she called and every head swiveled in my direction as I stood. The witch smiled at me as she led me back to the exam area. “Let’s get a height and weight on you,” she said, leading me to a decidedly old-fashioned looking scale, writing down my vital statistics. I glanced down at the sheet, glad to see I hadn’t shrunk. 

In the exam room, she took my temperature and blood pressure quickly and efficiently with several wand flicks and smiled at me reassuringly. “All right, Mr Potter. Everything looks good. Healer Robinson will be with you shortly.”

I nodded and sat on the exam table, paper crinkling underneath me, swinging my feet back and forth as I looked at the posters on the walls. They all showed doughty, older men swinging golf clubs, flying around on brooms and laughing together in large groups. _I’m not like that. I’m 30 years younger than those blokes,_ I thought rebelliously. I was in the middle of making up a story about the blokes laughing together in the pub when I heard a knock on the door and the Healer came in.

“Hello, I’m Healer Robinson,” he said, holding out an impeccably-manicured hand that I dutifully shook. While not quite as old as the men in the posters, he was quite a bit older than me, which put me at ease. He looked down at the chart in his hand and shook his head. “Never thought I’d get an opportunity to meet you.” 

“It’s good to meet you, too, Healer Robinson. You come highly recommended,” I said and he waved his hand in response, taking a seat on a low stool.

“So, you look like a healthy specimen. What brings you in here today?”

“Well, my wife and I are having some trouble having a baby …” I said, thinking back to the conversation that had landed me in this exam room.

“You want me to what?” I said as I was picking through a bin of potatoes. It was a chilly morning at the Ferry Building Farmer’s Market and I looked around for Teddy, spotting him at one of the bread vendors, using his charm to get free samples.

“I think you should get checked out,” Ginny said calmly, perusing a tray of pears. “Just to make sure everything’s all right.”

“Gin, I’m sure everything is fine,” I said, trying not to sound like an obstinate arsehole. I gave up on the potatoes and moved on to turnips.

“I’m sure it is, too, but it never hurts to check. Besides, I know you haven’t had a thorough checkup since you left the Aurors,” she said, handing me a chunk of pear.

I thought back, crunching down on the pear, startled to realize that I had now been out of the Aurors longer than I had been in. “Yeah, my yearly came up right before I resigned. I thought about blowing it off.”

“So you’re well-past due,” she said reasonably, putting several of the pears into a plastic bag.

“Gin,” I sighed, “I don’t want some strange bloke looking at my bits, all right?”

She looked up at me, brown eyes mirthful. “Oh, is Harry Potter suddenly too shy? Afraid the Healer might put his fingers somewhere they don’t belong?”

I rolled my eyes at her, picking out several turnips and putting them in the bag she held out for me. “I can’t believe you’re talking about this right now, right here.”

“Believe it, mister. Listen,” she said, adopting a softer tone, “I’ve got an appointment for myself and believe you me, it’s a hell of a lot more invasive than what you’ll be dealing with. I don’t get to just turn my head and cough.” 

“Okaaaaaay,” said the Muggle I was trying to pay for the turnips and pears, making me hot with embarrassment.

“Fine,” I hissed, “I will make an appointment and let some strange man put his hands all over me. Will that satisfy you?”

“Only if I get to watch.” She winked at me and turned away, joining Teddy at the bread vendor. I watched her walk away, shaking my head. After the initial disappointment, I knew that she was trying to keep a positive attitude, but I could see it wearing her down. I made the appointment the next day.

And now I got to sit in an exam room and have what could only be described as the most uncomfortable chat full of excruciating personal details that I’d ever experienced. “Well, your habits seem fine. Nothing … excessive. No obvious physical problems,” the Healer said, making some notes. “Do you have any children from any other relationships?”

“None. I’ve always been exceedingly careful.” 

“I can imagine,” he said with a snort. He looked at the chart again. “How long have you been trying to conceive?”

“Only since September. My wife likes to have all of her ducks in a row,” I said with a shrug.

“Well, it’s early days yet. Sometimes it can take a while to get that first one in there and then before you turn around there’s three more!” he said with a loud laugh. “I think we’ll get a sample from you today and we’ll go from there.”

“A what?”

“A sperm sample. We need to examine your sperm and make sure they’re healthy,” he said, as if it were the most normal thing in the world. And I guess in his world, it was. “Unless you think you won’t be able to?”

“Ah, no … I should be able…”

“Excellent. I’ll have Anna show you to the room.”

“Uh, the room?”

Healer Robinson looked at me with a wide grin. “You don’t think we’d make you try and produce a sample in here, do you? We’ve got a nice, private room with everything you should need.”

“Sounds marvelous,” I said faintly. 

The charming young mediwitch came into the examination room. “If you’ll follow me, Mr Potter,” she said, smiling at me with bright eyes. Outside an unmarked door, she handed me a small plastic cup with a lid. My name and the date were written on it. “When you’re done, put it in the metal box and close the lid, then give it two taps with your wand.” 

I looked at the cup and then at her. “You don’t have to fill it up. We just need one sample.” Utterly mortified, I could only nod as she opened the door to what I can only describe as a masturbatory wonderland. “All right. Remember, into the metal box, close the lid, two taps with your wand. There’s a button there if you need anything.” She pointed to a red button on a table next to what looked like a very comfortable armchair.

“Thanks.” Clutching my cup, I went into the room, blowing out a breath when she finally closed the door. I quickly locked it with my wand and then applied a Silencing Charm for good measure. Staring around the room, my eyes jumped from place to place. There was a stack of magazines, wizard and Muggle both, a shelf full of DVDs, a few novels and an enormous pump bottle of Astroglide. The walls were decorated with erotic artwork clearly designed to cater to several different tastes.

I sat down heavily in the armchair, eyes settling on a poster of a saucy witch eternally pulling down her knickers as she leaned forward and blew kisses at me. “Well, let’s see what we’ve got.” I looked over the available materials, hoping to find something that would make this whole experience easier, but I was out of luck on that count. Taking a deep breath, I settled myself more comfortably in the armchair and did what I always did and thought of Ginny.

That night as we were getting ready for bed, Ginny grilled me on the experience. “So, how’d it go?” she asked as she pulled on her pajama bottoms.

“Fine. I haven’t shrunk or gotten fat. Didn’t have a temperature or high blood pressure,” I answered, being deliberately evasive. I knew what she really wanted to know. It was a chilly night and I put a light Warming Charm on the bed before sliding in under the covers, gathering Ginny to me as she got in.

“What about the other thing?”

“The other thing?”

“You know,” she said, tapping me on the tip of my nose in exasperation.

I laughed and grabbed her finger. “Oh my God, Gin. They have a veritable wank palace in there. Magazines, movies, books, posters and the biggest pump bottle of lube I’ve ever seen,” I said, holding my hand above my chest to illustrate the size of the bottle. “Teddy wouldn’t know whether to shit or go blind.”

“Not Teddy!” she protested.

“Oh, definitely Teddy. Come on, you’re a doctor—you know what boys his age get up to.” 

“Yes, but that’s other boys. Not our Teddy,” she said primly, making me laugh again. 

“Oh, love. Why do you think he takes such long showers?”

“Because he likes to be clean.” She traced a fingertip around one of my nipples. “Listen, I don’t want to talk about what our godson may or may not be getting up to in the shower, all right?”

“What do you want to talk about?” I murmured, distinctly aware of her hand traveling lower.

“Did you look at the magazines? What kind did they have?” She looked up at me, brown eyes full of desire.

“All kinds,” I whispered, lowering my mouth to hers.

***  
Christmastime again and we were quickly absorbed into the Weasley chaos. It somehow seemed like there was more of it than ever before and I was glad that we were staying at Grimmauld Place to get a break. Teddy was only too happy to serve as the center of attention, regaling the cousins with tales of life in California. 

Ginny threw herself into the holiday preparations with a vengeance, volunteering the both of us for each and every little task that needed to be done, which was how I found myself in the back garden of the Burrow with Ron, putting together an elaborate play structure.

“Hang on,” Ron said, frowning at the enormous instruction sheet. “I think we’ve got the wrong part here.” He crouched down next to the box of assorted bolts and fasteners, picking up several and holding them up to the illustrations. “What do you think?” he asked, holding one up.

I shrugged, haunted by memories of endless hours spent putting together the furniture for Teddy’s room. 

“Are you all right, mate?” Ron asked, looking up at me from his crouch.

“Yeah. Why?”

“I dunno. You seem a bit distracted. Ginny, too.”

I shrugged again, feeling caught between a rock and a hard place. Before leaving San Francisco, we’d agreed that we wouldn’t advertise what we were doing, but Ron pointing out our distraction made me realize how isolated I’d been feeling over the whole thing. Sighing, I dropped down to sift through the box of parts with Ron. “We’ve been trying to get pregnant and things aren’t going well.”

I’d expected some sort of “Gross, my sister!” reaction from him, but he simply nodded. “How long have you been trying?”

“Since September. We had a busy summer and Gin didn’t want to mess it up with being sick,” I said, relieved to finally talk to someone. “We’ve had a couple of times where we thought she was, but then her monthly comes a bit later than usual and it’s like all of the life just goes out of her.” I shook my head and looked at Ron. “I don’t know what to do, mate.”

He picked out several bolts and stood. “Not a whole lot you can do, yeah? Just be there and keep her going.”

“That’s what I’ve been doing, but I feel bloody useless,” I said, surprised by how relieved I was to finally voice that feeling. This sort of thing wasn’t something I’d chat to Archimedes about down at the pub.

“Don’t you mean even more useless?” he asked with a grin. “Here, pick up that beam there.” We bent to the work of building, falling into a language of grunts and gestures as we were wont to do during physical labor. Magic definitely made things easier, but we did most of it ourselves as a point of pride.

After a couple of hours, we took a step back to look at our progress, sweating despite the cold bite of the December air. We’d finished the skeleton of the thing and now had to put in the slide, swings, rope bridge and several ladders. “She make you get tested?” Ron asked out of the blue.

I repressed a shudder at the memory. “Yeah. Everything’s fine. My sperm are apparently the Michael Phelps of the sperm world,” I said, smiling at Ron’s confused look. “Bloody good Olympic swimmer,” I explained. 

“Ah. Well, that’s good then, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, but now Gin’s convinced there’s something wrong with her.”

“Is there?”

I shook my head. “Not that they’ve found. She got herself checked out and as far as they can tell, everything’s fine. No blockages, she’s never had any … issues with her monthly, her bits are all where they’re supposed to be.”

“Stress? She’s still doing that Muggle doctor thing, right?”

“She’s in her last year of her residency, yeah.” I looked off toward the house, wondering what she was up to in there. “It’s still busy and hectic, but not as bad as it was her first year. The Healer told her to try and relax more and just let things take their course.”

Ron snorted, the cold air making two white plumes in front of him. “When have you ever known my sister to relax and let things take their course?”

“Exactly.” 

We got back to work, deciding to tackle the rope bridge first as it looked the most complicated and didn’t talk again until we were finished with the whole thing just as the sun was starting to go down in earnest. After plastering it with Stability, Endurance and Weatherproofing Charms, we stood back to survey our handiwork. “This thing is going to last forever,” Ron proclaimed, folding his arms.

“Yeah, not half bad for a couple of soft desk jockeys like us, yeah?” Ron laughed and we made quick work of the rubbish, piling it up and Vanishing it in mere moments.

As I turned back toward the house, Ron put his hand on my shoulder and I looked at him quizzically. “So, uh, Hermione’s pregnant again,” he said hesitantly.

“That’s fantastic!” I said, feeling equal parts of both joy and jealousy. We’d been hoping to be the ones making the announcement at Christmas dinner. “I’m really happy for you guys.”

“We haven’t told anyone yet—we just found out ourselves a couple of weeks ago—but we were going to make an announcement at dinner tomorrow.” His eyes darted to the house and then back to me. “But we don’t have to. If you think it’ll upset Ginny?”

Words cannot describe how touched I was by Ron’s offer at that moment. All of his life, he’d felt overshadowed by his brothers or by me and here he was passing up a legitimate opportunity to be the center of attention, all because of his love and concern for his sister and me. I stood there, groping for words. “I dunno if it would upset her. She loves you both so much and I know she’d be happy for you. Ask her yourself?”

Ron nodded and clapped me on the shoulder. “I’ll have Hermione talk to her. I’d just fuck it up.”

***  
“What are they doing out there?” Hermione asked as she looked out of the kitchen window at Harry and Ron in the back garden. They were squatting down around a giant box of parts, surrounded by bits of the enormous play structure that was my dad’s present to the grandchildren. 

I smiled at seeing Harry’s dark hair next to Ron’s bright red-gold as they puzzled out the directions. “I have no idea, but I hope they know they’re on a deadline.”

“Oh, they know,” Mum said. “I told Arthur ages ago that he had better get busy with that monstrosity and not leave it until the last minute, but you know your father.” She shook her head in the general direction of the lounge where said father was currently hiding behind a copy of the Daily Prophet. 

I turned away from the window and looked into the organized chaos of the kitchen. There were stacks of fresh-baked loaves, all wrapped neatly in tea towels, gaily packaged bricks of fruitcake ready to be distributed to visitors and a veritable avalanche of sugar cookies, just waiting to be decorated by the hordes of grandchildren that would be descending tomorrow. My hands felt like they were still covered in starch from the Mt Everest of potatoes I’d peeled and poor Hermione’s eyes were still red from the onions she’d been assigned. “Is there anything else you need, Mum?” I asked.

“Oh, no, I think that’s most of it. We’ll just have something simple tonight, I think.” I breathed a quiet sigh of relief and glanced at Hermione, tilting my head toward the stairs. 

“All right. Well, just give a shout if you need us, all right?” I said, scooping a mug of hot cider from the gently bubbling pot on the cooker.

“You girls go on and catch up,” she said with a patented Molly Weasley smile. Not needing a second invitation, we beat it quickly up the stairs, Hermione making a quick stop at my old room to check on the sleeping Rose while I continued up to Ron’s old attic room.

“How is she?” I asked when Hermione came in and settled herself on Ron’s old desk chair.

“Still asleep. We’re so lucky that she's a good sleeper,” she said with a happy smile. She took a sip from her mug of hot tea and fixed me with a look I knew all too well. “So, how have you been?”

“Fine,” I said brightly, knowing that my tone would do nothing to put her off the scent. I wasn’t going to give in so easily, though.

“How’s your residency? Third year, right? Things should be a bit easier now that you’ve got first and second years to push things down on, now.”

“Well, it’s still long days, but I’m not on call as much now, which I know Harry definitely likes,” I said, remembering his grumbles when I’d get called into hospital. After I reminded him that he used to get called away from me at all hours, he shut right up.

“That must make it nice with Teddy now. Getting to spend regular time together as a family,” she said, taking another maddening sip of her tea.

I sighed and leaned against the headboard of Ron’s bed, stretching my legs out in front of me. “Why don’t you get to the point, Hermione?”

“What’s going on with you? Is everything all right between you and Harry? You both seem a bit … off,” she said, not quite pouncing.

“Curse your perceptiveness,” I said as I shook my head. I thought I’d been doing a good job, but apparently not good enough. “Harry and I are trying to have a baby.”

Her eyes lit up and she leaned forward. “And?”

“And it’s not going too well.” I shrugged and looked down into the cup of cooling cider. “I’ve been late a couple of times, but then my period comes like always.”

“How late?” she asked gently.

“The second time I was almost three weeks late,” I said, still not looking at her.

“Oh, Ginny,” she said after what seemed like an endless moment of silence. I heard her get up off the chair and felt the old bed bend almost in half as she sat down on the edge, gathering me in her arms. 

I clung to her, trying not to cry but utterly unable to hold back my tears as she rocked and soothed me as if I was baby Rose until the storm finally passed and I let go of her, wiping my eyes with shaking hands. “That last one just happened. We were really hoping we’d get to make an announcement at Christmas dinner.”

Hermione stroked her hand down my hair. “I’m so sorry, love. When it’s that early …”

“I know,” I said, feeling numb. “It wasn’t really ever going to be viable, so down it goes.” I sat back and finished my cider in a huge gulp, avoiding Hermione’s eyes. “Harry went and got checked out and he’s fine. He shows ‘excellent motility and a low incidence of abnormalities’,” I said, quoting from the report from Healer Robinson.

“Have you seen anyone?” Hermione asked, sounding hesitant.

“I did. Got poked, prodded, probed and everything is fine. I thought something might be slightly off with my uterus—tipped or fibroids—but no. You know I've always been regular and there’s never been anything odd about it.” I sighed and looked out of Ron’s window. I could see Harry and Ron far below. They’d made excellent progress on the play structure while I’d been bawling my eyes out.

“Did you tell the Healer about that time Harry came to your flat?”

“I did. The Healer said sometimes it just happens and that I should just relax and let things take their natural course.”

Hermione gave me a wry smile. “And the last time you let that happen was …?”

“I know.” I let out another sigh, wishing I had more cider. “We’ve only been trying since September, so it’s too early to panic yet.” Even though I said this, I didn’t quite believe it. I looked at my mum with seven children to her credit and I couldn’t even get one?

“How’s Harry feeling?”

“You know him. Doesn’t talk much about his own feelings, always makes sure I’m all right.” I looked toward the window again. “I’m sure he’s told Ron, though. That’ll be good; he doesn’t really have anyone he can talk to about this sort of thing in San Francisco.”

Hermione got up from the bed and stood at the window, looking down at our husbands. I looked at her there, noticing how she rested her hand on her abdomen and I narrowed my eyes. “You.”

She turned to look at me, realized where her hand was and hastily moved it to her side. “Sorry.”

I stood up and hugged her tight. “No, no, don’t be, don’t be,” I crooned into her remarkably less bushy hair. 

“But you and Harry …” she said, sounding on the verge of tears herself.

“You let me and Harry worry about us, all right?” I said, satisfied to see her nod. I pulled out my wand and put on my best professional face. “Now, Ms Granger, what was the date of your last period?” 

Later that night as we lay curled together in what had been Sirius’s bedroom at Grimmauld Place, I confessed to Harry that I had told Hermione about our difficulties. “I figured you had,” he said quietly, kissing me on the temple. “I told Ron.”

“I figured. He give you a hard time about telling him stuff about his baby sister?”

“Surprisingly enough, he did not.” Harry sighed and squeezed me tighter. “I told him that I feel bloody useless and he said that there wasn’t a whole lot I could do other than just be there.”

“That sounds unexpectedly wise. Are you sure it was Ron you were talking to?” He chuckled and I gave him a squeeze of my own. “Besides, there’s plenty you can do.”

“Such as?”

I pursed my lips in thought. “Clean the cat box, make dinner, do all of the shopping—”

“I already do those things,” Harry interrupted, skating his fingers down my flank.

“You do? Your wife sounds horrible for you to be so henpecked,” I said, placing my lips against his Adam’s apple.

“She has this thing about spending most of her waking hours in this bloody huge building full of sick people.” He dug his fingers into my side, right where he knew I was the most ticklish and I jumped. “Besides, she’s not so bad once you get to know her.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry and Ginny get some news.

I stood in our garage-cum-lab, staring at the neatly-racked vials of the Pregnancy Detecting Potion I’d made what seemed like ages ago. Taking a deep breath, I ran my finger along the vials as if trying to sense the one that would give me the answer I wanted. 

“Just pick one,” Harry muttered, standing next to me.

I turned to look at him and deliberately put my hand on one and then switched to another one just to antagonize him. “We’ll use this one,” I said, drawing it carefully out of the rack and putting it in a test tube holder on the worktop. I drew out the stopper and gave the potion a quick sniff. It still smelled of lilacs, so it was still good. Feeling as if I were watching someone in a movie, I used my wand to draw a few beads of blood from the tip of my index finger, carefully dropping them into the test tube and putting the stopper back in place.

“Now what?” Harry asked, sounding tense.

“Now I give it a little shake,” I said, picking up the vial and shaking it gently three times to integrate my blood into the potion. “And then we wait.” I set the little tube back into the holder, moving as carefully as if it were nitroglycerin.

“How long?”

“About five minutes.” We stood there silently, both trying not to stare at the vial. I wished I had brought a jumper down with me; the late March weather made the converted garage chillier than I usually liked. Harry noticed and wrapped his arms around me as we continued to stare at the vial. 

In the blink of an eye, the color of the potion went from a deep, mossy green to clear and I felt my heart give a lurch. “What? What does that mean?” Harry asked, peering at the clear liquid in the vial.

I picked it up and gave it a couple of swishes, holding it up to the light. Not a trace of green remained. “It means I’m pregnant,” I said, smiling up at Harry.

His grin almost literally lit up the room and he picked me up, squeezing me hard enough to crack my back as he kissed me. “Sorry!” he said, setting me back down.

“No, it’s all right. I’ve had a bit of an ache and I think you’ve just sorted that for me.” I looked at the vial still clutched in my hand and felt a wild swoop in my stomach. _Pregnant! Confirmed!_

“So, do you know how far along?”

I closed my eyes, thinking back. “I figure nearly six weeks.”

Harry hugged me again, not picking me up this time, and we stood, swaying gently side to side in the chilly lab until he let me go and looked down at me. I could see his eyes were shiny with unshed tears and that surprised me. “All right?” I asked.

He nodded, removing his glasses to swipe at his eyes and taking a long breath. “Brilliant,” he said, taking my hand. We went back up the stairs, my mind racing with everything that needed to be done in the next thirty-four weeks. _When will that be? Should be in the middle of November sometime,_ I thought, relieved that our child would not have a Halloween birthday. 

Reaching our door, we paused. “Should we tell Teddy?” Harry asked quietly.

“Not just yet,” I said after a moment’s thought. “Let him be an only child for a little while longer.”

The next morning, I sent a message to Sarah, asking if she would like to go out to lunch on Saturday afternoon. _I haven’t seen you in a while and I feel like we need to catch up,_ I thought as I watched my hummingbird zip away. 

“Why don’t you just send a message to her phone?” Teddy asked as he shoveled cornflakes into his mouth, ever-present phone in his hand.

“She doesn’t have a phone and besides, this is the most secure way to send a message to someone. The Patronus will go straight to that person,” I said, irritated when he looked away from me to focus on the tiny, glowing screen of his phone. “With a Patronus, no one can do this,” I said, quickly snatching the phone out of his grasp. As usual, he was chatting away with Duncan.

“Hey, that’s mine!” he protested. “Harry! She took my phone!”

“She sure did,” Harry said, continuing to sip his tea and read the newspaper.

I quickly typed out a message to Duncan. _Hello, Duncan! This is Ginny. I’m afraid Teddy isn’t available at the moment as he’s learning a very valuable lesson in security!_ I looked over at Teddy and saw he’d adopted an air of patient superiority, sitting with his arms folded as if he didn’t care what I was doing with his treasured phone. His eyes changing colors belied his emotional state, however. 

The phone vibrated and I looked down. _??? Ginny! Long time, no talk! Teddy won’t give me your number! Are you coming to the Quidditch match this weekend? We’re going to demolish Mission Valley!_

_Of course I’ll be there! I have to cheer on my favorite Beater and Chaser, don’t I?_

_::flex::_

_LOL! All right, Teddy’s about to burst, so I’m handing back to him now. You be good today! Don’t give Mr Potter any of your nonsense!_

_I would never! TTYL!_

I presented my cheek to Teddy and he grudgingly kissed it, breathing a sigh of relief when he got his phone back and saw I hadn’t done any actual damage to his reputation. Harry grinned at me and I felt a frisson of delight. There, in the middle of my kitchen with my husband, godson and the new beginning inside of me, I felt indomitable. 

That feeling lasted until I got a whiff of the bacon that waited for me on the plate and I abruptly felt as if I were being tossed about on a tiny boat in very rough seas. Barely making it to our loo in time, I did obeisance to the porcelain god, feeling thoroughly wrung out when it was over. 

“Gin?” Harry called softly through the door. “Are you all right?”

“Yeah,” I called back, standing up and swishing my mouth out with some water. I opened the door and smiled up at Harry to ease his worried look. “I’m fine. See?” I executed a perfect twirl in the doorway and he snorted. 

“You had me worried when you ran out,” he said drawing me into a hug.

“It was the bacon. I smelled it and it was all over. Did Teddy notice?”

“No. He wouldn’t notice if a bomb went off next door.” He looked down at me, pushing a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “Can I get you anything?”

“Can you eat that bacon and make me some toast?”

“I can do that,” he said, kissing me on the forehead.

Thankfully, the nausea seemed to have gone away and I was able to have my tea and toast in peace before heading in to work. The morning passed in a blur and before I knew it, it was time for lunch. Not wanting to risk any more stomach upset, I decided I’d stick to soup and crackers, sitting down at our usual table with Ben.

He watched as I crushed up five packets of saltines and put them in my chicken noodle soup and stirred them around until they reached the peak of sogginess. “What?” I asked through a mouthful of soup and cracker mush.

He cocked his head to the side, looking at me out of narrowed eyes. “You seem different today.”

“Different how?” I asked, sitting up straight. “Is my skin clearer? My hair thicker and more lustrous?” I took it out of my usual bun and spread the red length over my shoulders, batting my eyelashes at him. His eyes went round and his mouth made an O of amazement as I covered my face and giggled.

“Are you, really?” he asked in a hushed tone, leaning close and I nodded, sure that I was turning bright red. “When did you find out?”

“Last night. The potion turned clear!”

He sat back and looked confused. “Potion? Is that like the rabbit dying?”

Now it was my turn to be confused. “Why would a rabbit die?”

“Never mind. Tell me everything!” We spent the rest of our lunchtime talking about pregnancy, babies, names, breastfeeding and everything else related. I told him how the Pregnancy Detecting Potion worked by detecting the elevated level of hCG in my blood and he was surprised that there was actually a scientific mechanism behind it. “You didn’t have to pee on a stick? Just put a few drops of blood into this stuff?”

“Yes. Much more elegant, don’t you think?” I finished my soup, pleased that my stomach still felt fine. “I’m going to ask Sarah to be my midwife.”

“Oh? Is that how witches do it?”

I nodded, wishing I had a couple more packets of crackers. “Yes, witches only go to hospital if there’s something really gone wrong. I’ve done a fair bit of midwifing since I’ve been here.”

“Well, I’m sure she’ll be delighted.” He looked at his watch and groaned. “Ugh, I’m meeting with Dr Samuels in ten.” We both stood up and he grabbed me up in a huge bear hug. “I’m so happy for you. This kid is going to be gorgeous with you and Harry for parents!”

“Oh, you’re sweet to say so.”

“Have you seen that husband of yours? Girl!” He gave me another hug and we went our separate ways in the always-busy hospital. As I walked down the hallway, I thought about what Ben said about how our child would look and I smiled, dreaming of a child with Harry’s dark hair and brilliant green eyes. 

Saturday, after a raucous Quidditch match with our southern California rivals, Mission Valley Institute, I hurried to get to lunch with Sarah while Harry took Teddy and the boys out for pizza to celebrate their victory. We were meeting at our favorite Mexican place that was famous for their Margaritas and I was a little sad that I wouldn’t be able to enjoy one for a while. I spotted her at a table by the window and sat down in a rush.

“Sorry I’m late! Teddy had a Quidditch match this morning and I would have been in far too much trouble if I’d missed it!” I said after kissing her on the cheek.

“It’s quite all right! I’ve been spending my time watching the world go by. It’s a beautiful day and everyone’s in such a rush!” she said with her brilliant smile. “I ordered you a Margarita.”

“Oh, you really shouldn’t have,” I said, picking up my menu to hide my grin.

“And why not? It’s always wonderful to have a drink waiting for you when you arrive. Here they come now.” A moment later, a waiter set down two enormous, bell-shaped glasses full of pure alcoholic delight and I had to resist the impulse to lick the salt from the rim and take a deep swallow. 

I lowered my menu and watched as Sarah did exactly that. “No, you really shouldn’t have,” I said, watching her expression change as comprehension dawned and that brilliant smile came out again.

“Ginny,” she whispered as she took my hand and squeezed it tight. “That’s wonderful! You did the potion?”

I nodded, not really trusting my voice to speak. I reached for the glass of water with my other hand and took a long drink. “Would you be my midwife?”

“I would be honored,” she said, obviously flattered by my request. She opened her huge handbag and pulled out a worn day planner and a pen. “Now, how far along do you think you are?” she asked, thumbing through the pages. 

We spent the rest of the time at the restaurant planning, noting down trimester milestones and formulating an eating plan. “I know what you get up to at that hospital,” she said sternly. “You can’t let yourself be run off your feet. Keep some nuts on you, at least.” 

“Yes ma’am,” I grinned, glad that she was on my side. Not for the first time, I thought that Sarah would be a formidable opponent if crossed. 

“Have you been checked yet?”

“No, I have an appointment next week,” I said. “Harry is going to come with me.”

“Is he nervous? I remember Archimedes was when I was pregnant with our first. Always trying to do things for me and just making the most terrible messes,” she said with fond remembrance.

“Well, Harry does most of the cooking anyway, so if there’s a mess to be made, it’s going to be me making it!”

***  
Many would say that I’ve had an eventful life and I would tend to agree with them. I’ve seen a lot of things happen and had several terrible things happen to me, but nothing comes even close to watching my wife close herself off from me. We’d had a bare week of joy, of a shared secret, before it all came crashing down in a Healer’s exam room. Never in my life had I seen such happiness turn into sorrow so quickly.

When I was The Boy Who Lived, I _usually_ had a pretty good idea of what I had to do and at the end, I definitely knew what to do, but now I feel completely useless. Outwardly, she seemed fine. Quieter than usual, more tired, but that could easily have been attributed to the long hours she spent at the hospital, coming home hours after Teddy and me. I always had something set aside for her, kept warm and fresh by magic, but more often than not, she begged off.

“Thanks, Harry, but I had a snack at work. I’m just going to go to bed,” she said one night when she didn’t come home until nearly ten. Teddy was in his room, so she made no attempt at hiding the apathy in her voice. 

“Gin, you need to eat,” I said, practically begging her.

“What for?” she asked, looking me straight in the eye with devastating calm. 

Gutted, I could only look away, listening to the sound of her footsteps as she walked away from me, retreating into sleep. 

Later that night, I listened to her breathing as I lay next to her, unable to sleep. Conscious of waking her, I stayed very still and did not touch her at all, a new situation for us. We usually slept with some part of our bodies touching, but that had changed of late. This was another thing I didn’t know how to fix. 

I closed my eyes, wishing for sleep, but I found myself remembering that first visit to the Healer’s just a few weeks ago. Things had started out great with Healer Johnson putting her hands all over Ginny, gently prodding her still-flat belly as they chattered away. I mostly just sat there and tried to disappear into the background until she picked up a device that looked rather like a cone with a small speaker attached at the end. 

“Ready to hear your baby’s heartbeat?” she asked, smiling at both of us. My own heart sped up as Ginny reached her hand out to take mine, a brilliant smile on her face. Healer Johnson put the cone against Ginny’s abdomen and slowly moved it around, searching for the elusive, fast swish-swish sound I’d found a sample of online. 

Frowning, the Healer moved the cone more slowly and I glanced at Ginny. She had her own frown and I could see her holding back the urge to make suggestions. “That’s odd,” the Healer murmured, setting aside the device to press down on Ginny’s stomach, making her suck in a breath. She put the cone back on her, and we all leaned in toward it, listening intently and hearing nothing. 

“And the potion turned clear?” the Healer asked, continuing to slide the device around.

“Yes,” Ginny said, voice tight.

“Where did you get the potion from?”

“I made it myself.” Her tone was sharp and the Healer colored a little. 

“Of course.” She turned to her chart and I heard her murmuring “eight weeks” and “should be there” to herself. I squeezed Ginny’s hand and she squeezed back hard enough to make my knuckles grind together. “I’ll be right back,” the Healer said as she left the exam room.

We sat silently until she returned a few minutes later. She was carrying a device that looked like a picture frame without any picture in it, just clear glass. I raised my eyebrows at Ginny, but she wasn’t looking at me; she was looking at Healer Johnson and the device. “An Imaging Window?” she asked.

“Yes. I want to take a look in there and see if he or she is hiding way down deep. Sometimes they do,” she said with a reassuring smile. “I’m sure everything is fine.” Admonishing Ginny to lie still, she laid the device on her bare skin and tapped her wand against the frame, murmuring the incantation to activate it. 

I sat up straighter as the pane of glass glowed, but I couldn’t make any sense out of what I was seeing. Dark gray, white and black all ran together, but it must have meant something to Healer Johnson. “Ah, there you are,” she said quietly and I let out a breath I didn’t know I had been holding. She made some gestures, sliding her fingers across the pane and I watched as her expression darkened. 

“What’s wrong?” Ginny asked quietly.

The Healer was quiet for several moments before she answered, Ginny grinding my knuckles the whole time. “I see the sac, but I don’t see the fetus. And the sac is smaller than it should be. You’re certain of the date of your last period?”

“Yes.”

The Healer tapped the device again and the strange, glowing images went away. She set the thing aside and picked up Ginny’s chart, making several notes. “According to that, then you should be around eight weeks gestational age. There is the chance that we might not be able to hear the heartbeat, but I should be able to see the fetus on the Imaging Window and I don’t see one.” 

I didn’t think it was possible, but Ginny managed to clamp down on my hand even harder. “Are you certain?” she said, her voice determinedly calm.

“Well, it may not be anything. We could still be a couple of weeks off and you’re only six weeks instead of eight.” She finally looked up from her notes and smiled. “Let’s schedule you for another look-see in a week. I’m sure we’ll hear something then.”

But we didn’t. The next week, it was the same thing. “I’m sorry,” Healer Johnson said, “but the pregnancy doesn’t seem to be progressing.”

“What?” I asked. The Healer looked at me, startled that I had even spoken. I cleared my throat. “What does that mean?”

“It means that there’s something wrong,” Ginny answered, sounding empty of emotion. 

“That there _may_ be something wrong. Let’s give it a bit more time and see what develops.” She sounded like she was trying to be cheerful, but it fell flat in the small exam room. On the way out, we scheduled an appointment for the next week. 

At home, Ginny retreated into quiet despite my attempts to draw her out of her shell. When I reached for her hand she either drew away or stayed passive. Even worse, when I tried to kiss her, she turned away. _She needs her space, don’t pressure her,_ I said to myself.

“What’s the matter with Ginny?” Teddy asked me quietly when Ginny refused dinner and just went to bed.

“She’s feeling a bit under the weather. She’ll be all right,” I said with a confidence I didn’t feel. 

Our last visit at the Healer’s and there was no change. Just an empty sac and even though we were both expecting it, the news was devastating, leaving me shaking and confused. “Nothing?” I asked, my voice sounding loud in the exam room. “But the potion turned clear.”

“Technically, there is a pregnancy, but there is no fetus. It’s likely that there was, but it wasn’t viable and Ginny just hasn’t miscarried yet.” The words were delivered gently, but they still hit me with the force of physical blows.

“I want it out. I’m not waiting to miscarry,” Ginny said, sounding cold and hard. 

“Ginny, it’s usually best to let things run their natural course—”

“No. Get it out of me,” she interrupted. 

The Healer looked at her for a long moment and finally nodded. “All right. We’ll get you an appointment.”

_Tomorrow,_ I thought as I turned over on my side, still looking at my wife in the dim light of the room. She didn’t want me to come with her and I thought about insisting, but I didn’t want to force myself into a space she clearly didn’t want me in. It was late enough that I was sure she was actually sleeping instead of pretending as she had been these days, so I reached out a hand, laying it gently on the curve of her hip, the feeling of her heat against my palm soothing. Moving slower than slow, I wormed my way over to her, crossing the empty space separating us until I snugged up against her, soaking in her warmth.

The next morning, she was up before me and I woke to the sound of the shower. At breakfast, she just sipped tea, refusing even toast. I deliberately hung back, waiting for Teddy to leave before I did. Once he was gone in a flurry of soot and powder, I turned to Ginny.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come?” I asked, taking both of her hands in mine. To my relief, she didn’t just let hers hang limply in mine, but took hold.

“I’m sure. There’s nothing for you to do, really. They’ll put me to sleep and perform the procedure, wake me up and send me home,” she said, making it sound as if she was just popping over to the shop for some milk. 

“How will you get home? I can come with the car.”

“I’ll be fine to Apparate.” She squeezed my hands and gave me a small smile. “Don’t worry, love.”

“I will worry.”

“I know you will.” She went up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips softly to mine; the first kiss in what seemed like forever. 

All morning, I was distracted and my classes were impossible to manage, the rambunctious teenagers seriously making me contemplate just packing it all in and running away. At lunchtime, I skipped meeting Juanita in the lunchroom and sat at my desk, head in my hands, trying not to think of what Ginny must be going through. 

_They should be starting any moment now,_ I thought as I looked at my watch. I’d thought about having Ginny describe the procedure to me, but I didn’t want to make her talk about something she herself wasn’t looking forward to. I’d looked up the Muggle procedure and instantly regretted it, fervently hoping that the Wizarding Healer procedure would somehow not be as awful. 

As I sat there, I tried to sort out my own feelings. I felt the whole thing was rather unfair. Everyone else gets pregnant at the drop of a hat; why couldn’t we? What was wrong with us? Unable to sit still any longer, I left my classroom and went to the loo. As I washed my hands, my old scar caught my eye and I froze. _Is this Voldemort’s lasting legacy? Am I doomed to be the last of my family?_ I shook my head in refusal. _No. It can’t be. Any bit of him is gone and has been for fifteen years._ I pushed aside these doubts and left, absently nodding to students lolling in the springtime sun. 

Back in my classroom, I resumed my spot at my desk, staring at my watch and wishing I was at Ginny’s side. That afternoon, I watched the clock as assiduously as any student, sending a message to Terry that I wouldn’t be able to make practice that afternoon. As soon as the last student was through my Floo, I practically ran out of my classroom, nearly knocking over Juanita.

“Harry, what—” she began, frowning at my haste.

“Sorry, got to go. I’ll chat tomorrow, yeah?” I threw over my shoulder. I sent my stag to Teddy, letting him know that I was heading home and that he should come home directly after Quidditch practice. _No messing about with Duncan, all right?_

Finally far enough off campus to Apparate, I appeared in our lounge, my eyes immediately falling on Ginny, curled into a ball on the sofa, Stuart purring away in her lap. Heedless of the expensive electronics inside, I dropped my bag to the floor and went to her, carefully pushing aside the cat and gathering her into my arms, holding onto her as we both fell apart, grieving for the child that never was to be.

***  
I stood in the empty apartment, reading over the pathology report. _Multiple chromosomal abnormalities incompatible with life,_ it said, the dry, impartial tone of the writing washing over me. Just a random error in cell division, something far beyond my ability to control. Sighing, I tossed the letter onto the kitchen worktop where Harry would be sure to see it. He’d want to know and I didn’t feel like being the one to tell him.

Truth be told, I wasn’t feeling much these days. I functioned in a sort of gray haze, moving automatically from home to work and back to home again. I kept my emotions bunched up like a tight fist, reasoning that if I didn’t allow myself to feel anything, then I couldn’t be hurt. 

I looked at my watch. Harry and Teddy would be home in a couple of hours and the thought of facing them, of having to be present and interact with them was exhausting. I relished the quiet of the apartment and stretched out on the sofa, idly turning on the telly and flipping through the channels. Stuart jumped up and made himself comfortable on my flat stomach. He was pretty much the only other living thing in the apartment I could tolerate right now, demanding nothing more from me than the occasional pat.

Settling on a vapid afternoon chat show, I closed my eyes, letting the ooohs and ahhhs of the studio audience soothe me. I’d had my six-week post-procedure exam this afternoon and Healer Johnson had given me the all-clear. “You can start trying again whenever you feel up to it,” she’d said with a smile. The thought of it filled me with dread. 

Why should it, though? I still loved Harry and I still wanted a baby, but the effort involved, the emotion, the vulnerability … the seemingly inevitable disappointment were all just too much to overcome. So I did nothing, choosing to exist in this gray space where I touched nothing and nothing touched me.

Waking from a doze, I realized the vapid chat show I’d had on earlier had transitioned to news and I frowned at my watch. Harry and Teddy would be home very soon, filling up the space with their presence and attention and I pushed down a rising panic. _I’ll hide in the lab,_ I thought as I got up from the sofa. _Harry will think I’m still at work and then I can ‘come home’ and go to sleep._

A moment later, I was down in the garage lab, old lights buzzing overhead. I hadn’t been down here since I’d used the Pregnancy Detecting Potion and watched it turn clear. My chest felt tight at the memory of pure elation and I took several deep breaths, pushing away the jangling brightness of the feeling, seeking the comfort of my gray fog. My eyes fell on the clear vial, still in the test tube holder I’d left it in and an electric shock forced its way through my detachment.

Suddenly angry beyond words, I picked up the vial and threw it as hard as I could toward the wall over the utility sink where it smashed to bits with a satisfying crash, the smell of lilacs permeating the air. Awash in savage delight, I grabbed the rack containing the unused vials. There were easily two dozen of them, reflecting back the moss green of a flawlessly brewed Pregnancy Detecting Potion, waiting for the opportunity to dispense good news. 

I picked one out, feeling the weight of the glass and liquid inside in my hand, weighing it carefully as I sighted the blotch left on the wall by the clear one. Focusing my rage, I threw it like a knife, watching as it flipped end over end to smash against the wall in the exact same place with that satisfying tinkle of exploding glass, leaving a splash of green that slowly trickled down. My time as a Chaser had done me well and I picked up another, expelling a grunt of effort as I hurled it as hard as I could.

The green blotch on the wall grew larger as I made a game of it, varying my throwing style but always hitting my target. Shards of glass glittered in the light of the lab and I imagined the sharp pieces shredding away the gray fog that enshrouded me, revealing the white-hot anger that burned inside of me. The anger that threatened to overwhelm me whenever I saw a pregnant woman waddling around the hospital or saw a young family out for a walk, pushchair leading the way. 

The shameful resentment at my brother’s letter, updating us on Hermione’s pregnancy. He’d enclosed a picture and she looked radiantly beautiful as she smiled down at Rose’s wonder-filled face, holding the girl’s hand against her rounded belly. I fought the urge to snatch the picture from Harry and crumple it into a tiny ball. I’d only nodded and said, “Nice.”

Reaching my hand out for the last vial, eyes fixed on the green stain on the wall, I felt another hand close over mine and I turned to see Harry. I felt a flash of fury at his invasion of my privacy. Didn’t he know that I was hiding from him? That I just couldn’t deal with his demands right now? That all I wanted was to be left alone and not be made to feel anything? Looking into eyes almost the exact same color of the potion I was throwing away with barbaric glee, I saw that he did know. 

I felt the tattered shreds of my comforting gray fog blow away, leaving me raw and I collapsed against him, heedless of his nice work shirt as he practically crushed me to him while all of the emotions I hadn’t been allowing myself to feel rushed to the surface. Together, we sank down to the concrete floor of the lab while the storm of anger, fear and helplessness rushing through me ran its course, leaving me with an altogether different feeling of exhaustion. 

Curled up on his lap, I finally looked up at him, afraid of what I might see in his face. “Sorry,” I whispered, relieved not to see pity or anger in his expression.

“For what?” he asked, his voice a rumble against my ear. I shrugged and he hugged me tighter, letting out a long sigh that sounded as if he’d been holding his breath for weeks. In a way, I suppose he had been. I don’t know how long we stayed like that on the floor of the lab, but I gradually became aware of Harry’s subtle shifting around and I realized that he must be incredibly uncomfortable.

“I should let you up,” I said quietly.

“Hang on a moment.” He dug around in his pocket and pulled out his phone, rapidly tapping out a message.

“Teddy?”

“Yeah. I sent him out for Chinese.” I felt his warm lips against my temple as he kissed me. “All right?”

I considered his question. I definitely wasn’t all right; I could feel the gray fog hovering close by, ready to engulf me again. “No, but I will be,” I finally said, feeling the faint ring of truth in my words.

Standing up, I helped Harry up, wincing at the mess I’d made of his nice white shirt, now full of makeup stains. He looked down and back up at me with a wry smile. “You don’t even look like you’re wearing makeup,” he said, taking my hand.

“Just a bit of mascara. Haven’t really had the energy for much else.” My eyes fell on the remaining vial of potion and I felt a burst of embarrassment over my childish behavior. Harry saw me looking at it and picked it up, bouncing it in his palm like I’d seen him do with a piece of chalk. Closing it in his fist, I watched as he cocked his arm back and hurled the vial with prodigious force, sending it crashing into the middle of the green blotch I’d made on the wall. 

“That felt _really_ good,” he remarked casually as we left the lab.

Later that night after Chinese food and terrible reality TV, I lay in bed curled up next to Harry, my head pillowed on his shoulder for the first time in ages. His hand stroking my hair was lulling me to sleep and I finally felt relaxed. “I saw the report,” he said quietly. 

“I left it there for you.”

“I figured you had.”

“Did Teddy see it?”

“No.” We had decided that we would not tell that we were trying to have a baby until there was actually something to tell. The last thing we needed was a teenage boy giving us awkward looks every time we hugged. 

“I had my checkup this afternoon,” I said after a few moments of silence.

“Oh?”

“I’m all clear for … whenever we want to start … trying again,” I said, holding my breath for his response.

His hand continued to move through my hair and I heard his heart speed up a little. “That’s good.”

I felt a rising anxiety and I closed my eyes, focusing on the feeling of being here with Harry, of being safe and loved and I felt the anxiety fade away. “Do you mind if we don’t, for a little while?”

“No, love.” He shifted onto his side, scooting down to look at me, running his thumb over my cheek. “I want you healthy and happy and if that means putting a baby on the back burner for now, that’s the way it’s going to be, yeah?”

I felt a knot in my chest I didn’t even know I had loosen and melt away, leaving me to breathe easy. “Yeah,” I whispered.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ginny has a dream.

I opened my eyes, expecting to see the hangings of my old bed at Hogwarts and was disoriented for a moment when instead of red and gold draperies, I saw pale blue walls full of pictures. Pictures of Harry at the beach, of him trying to wrap his arms around the trunk of an enormous redwood tree, standing on one foot on top of a rock, arms spread wide. Pictures of the both of us, making ridiculous faces into the camera. There were pictures of Teddy as well. Learning to surf, smiling wide in front of a birthday cake full of candles, celebrating his first Quidditch victory in his blue and gold St Ambrose’s uniform. 

_Why was I expecting Hogwarts?_ I thought muzzily as I turned over, hoping to snatch a few more minutes of sleep before I absolutely had to get up. _I was dreaming … about Hogwarts?_ No, that didn’t sound right. I’d definitely dreamt about the place before, but this dream wasn’t really about Hogwarts, more like it just happened to be set there.

I closed my eyes, still thinking about the dream and just as I slipped back into sleep, my whole body jerked, causing Harry to sit up in alarm. “Wha?” he asked, looking around the room.

“Sorry, love. My fault,” I said. I gave up on going back to sleep and sat back up, looking at the clock. I would have gotten only another five minutes anyway.

“Oh,” Harry said, collapsing down onto his back. “I thought we’d had an earthquake.” He held out an arm and I moved in close, laying my head on his shoulder. “What happened?”

“I did one of those sleep jerk things,” I said, resting my hand on his stomach. “I woke up and was trying to go back to sleep for five more minutes.”

“All right?” he asked, sounding more awake.

“Yeah. I had a dream and I was trying to remember it.”

“What was it?” His hand trailed up and down my bare arm, raising goosebumps.

“I don’t know. I was at Hogwarts, though.” I frowned. That didn’t sound quite right. I myself wasn’t at Hogwarts, but someone was, someone I was watching.

Harry grunted. “Haven’t dreamt of that place in a long time.” I viewed this as a good thing; Harry’s Hogwarts dreams were rarely happy ones. Just then, the alarm started to blare and he slapped his hand down on the button, shutting it off.

“Do you want the shower first?” I asked, moving to sit up.

Harry held me tighter, putting his other hand over mine on his stomach. “We could shower together,” he whispered, pressing his lips against my forehead. “Save time.”

I felt a small spurt of nervousness and covered it with a smile. “You always say that and we never save any time at all.”

“Can you blame me?” He gave me a lazy smile, the one that never failed to set my heart to racing and moved in to kiss me, pressing his lips to mine. 

“Won’t Teddy be suspicious when he hears our shower run only once, but we both have wet hair?” I felt my body responding to his touch and kissed him harder. 

“He’s fifteen now,” Harry said, as if that explained everything. He shifted positions, gently maneuvering me onto my back, sliding one hand underneath my tank top and I stiffened. Even though he was trying to hide it, I heard Harry sigh quietly. He kissed me on the forehead and got out of bed. “I’ll go first,” he said, closing the bathroom door.

A moment later, I heard the shower start and I let out my own sigh. In the weeks since I’d smashed almost all of the vials of Pregnancy Detecting Potion we had yet to do more than share the occasional hug and chaste kiss. I wanted to do more and I knew Harry definitely wanted to, but every time things started to move in that direction, I just froze up. 

I turned over onto my back, putting my arm over my eyes to block out the early morning sunlight, listening to Harry’s easy baritone as he sang I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For in the shower. _Maybe I should talk to someone,_ I thought as my mind drifted back to that dream. _I was watching someone … a boy. Harry? Why would I be watching him?_

As I turned these thoughts over in my mind, I heard the shower stop and Harry came out a moment later, hair dripping wet and a towel wrapped around his hips. “Nice serenade,” I said, smiling at his blush. For some reason, he was always surprised that he could be heard when he sang in the shower.

The rest of the morning passed in the usual scramble of getting everyone fed and properly equipped for the day and soon I was engulfed in the daily rhythms of the hospital. I didn’t get a chance to sit down until lunchtime with Ben. “What’s this?” I asked as he slid an envelope across the table to me. I raised my eyebrows at the return address. “Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles?”

“I can’t open it. You do it,” Ben said, looking like he was about to jump out of his seat.

“Are you sure you want me to open it?” I asked, picking it up. Ben nodded and I slid my finger under the flap. I took out the letter and quickly scanned it, schooling my face to neutrality. “Dear Mr Frye, we are pleased to offer you a position in Pediatric Critical Care at Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles—” That was a far as I got before he snatched the letter out of my hand and read it himself, blue eyes practically bulging out of his face.

“Oh, my God. This is the best news ever!” he said reverently, holding the letter to his chest.

“That’s wonderful news, love!” I said, genuinely happy for him, even though I was sad that he would be leaving me. He’d told me almost apologetically that he was applying for a position there so he could be closer to his family. 

“A likely story,” I’d said, giving him a smile and hoping he didn’t see my disappointment through it. “You just want to live where you can go to Disneyland every day.”

“Well, that was a thing I considered…” he said with a devilish grin. “Girl, I’m getting old and my parents aren’t getting any younger. It’s time.”

He carefully folded the letter and put it back in the envelope, setting it to the side of his tray. “What about you? Residency is over soon. Are you sticking around here or …?” I sighed and picked at my salad. If my original plan had worked out, I’d be pregnant, finish up my residency and then take some well-deserved time off while I waited for my baby and planned my next move. “I’m sorry!” Ben said, sounding stricken. “I shouldn’t have asked.”

“No, it’s fine,” I said, giving him a reassuring smile. He knew full well what my original plans had been. “I’ve been talking to Vijay Malhotra at SF Thaumaturgical about a research position.”

“That sounds like it would be a bit more calm than all of this,” he said, waving his hands at the packed cafeteria. 

“Trying to herd cats would be calmer than this!” I said, making him laugh. Our conversation turned to post-residency plans and hospital gossip until it was time for us to go back to our regularly scheduled madness. 

“Listen,” he said as we headed toward the dish return, “let’s go out this weekend. We haven’t been out in forever!”

I tried to think back to the last time we’d been out and realized that I couldn’t remember. I couldn’t even really remember the last time Harry and I had been out and I felt a pang of sadness. I resolved to rectify that soon. _Maybe Friday night? Teddy can stay with Duncan…_ I thought as I parted ways with Ben.

All day the dream continued to niggle at me and I found myself staring into space when I really should have been focusing on what was in front of me. “Are you all right, Dr Potter?” Carla asked me when I requested the chart I already had in my hand from her.

“Sorry, just a little distracted is all. Had a weird dream this morning and you know how they can stay with you,” I said, shrugging it off. She nodded wisely and proceeded to tell me about a dream she’d had about her abuela once and how it had bothered her all day until she finally broke down and called her to find out that she had fallen and broken her hip. 

“It was my abuela reaching out to me,” she said. “Maybe there’s someone reaching out to you?”

I tried to think of any young relatives I might have attending Hogwarts and realized that they were all girls; Percy’s daughters and Victoire. “I’ll have to call home tonight then and check on everyone,” I said, giving Carla a wide smile. I thought about what she said for the rest of the afternoon. Prophetic dreams certainly weren’t unheard of in the Wizarding world, but true Seers were rare and no one in my family had ever shown a shred of precognition. Auntie Muriel would occasionally insist that she’d had a dream that had predicted some event or other, but we all dismissed it as dotty ramblings.

That evening at dinner, I mentioned Ben had been offered his dream position at Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles. “Ben’s moving to LA?” Teddy asked, fork halfway to his mouth. “Is he still going to play Halo?”

“I’m sure he’ll still play Halo with you,” Harry said reassuringly. That video game was their current obsession. “Are you going to be okay?” he asked me, voice tinged with concern.

“I’ll be fine!” I said with more bravado than I felt. Ben had been the very first friend I’d made here and had helped me navigate so much of the bewildering Muggle world, even before he knew about magic and just thought I’d grown up extremely sheltered. Over the years, he’d evolved into what Harry teasingly called my “gay husband”. “Besides, we can go visit him whenever we want, can’t we?”

“Oh! Harry! Can I learn to Apparate early? And can you teach me how to do it silently like you and Ginny?” Teddy’s eyes were alight with the possibilities and I raised my eyebrow, waiting for Harry’s reaction.

“Teddy, you know that you can’t start to learn to Apparate until you’re sixteen and a half,” he said calmly, taking a sip of his wine.

“Ugh, that’s like forever away! I just turned fifteen! Duncan—”

“Duncan isn’t any different, even though his dad is an Auror.”

Teddy turned to me, giving me his “life is unfair” look. “Ginny, can’t you talk some sense into him? You got him to teach you!”

_Only because our lives were at stake,_ I thought, glad beyond words that Teddy had never had to face the dangers we had. “Oh no you don’t. It’s not good cop bad cop tonight.” Teddy harrumphed and went back to his dinner, cutting his chicken with more gusto than was warranted. Across the table, Harry smiled at me, lifting an eyebrow in acknowledgement of our united front in the face of teenage tempestuousness.

“So, are you and Ben going to celebrate his good news?” he asked after a few moments of silence.

“He said we should go out this weekend. Would you mind?” 

“Not at all. Me and Teddy will have a night in. How does pizza sound?”

“Actually, I have plans for Saturday night. Me and Duncan and the guys are going to get together at his place and do stuff,” Teddy said, mopping up the last of the sauce on his plate with a piece of bread.

“What sort of stuff?”

Teddy shrugged. “Stuff. Games.”

“Will there be any girls there?” Harry asked and I smiled to see Teddy’s ears turn pink.

“Maybe.”

“And Duncan’s parents will be there?”

“Yes,” Teddy said with an aggravated sigh.

“All right. Looks like pizza for one, then. When were you going to tell us about these _plans?_ ” Harry asked, fixing Teddy with his ‘teacher look’.

“Duh, Harry, I just did!” Faced with such perfect teenage logic, I had to hide my smile in my own wineglass. 

“Are you sure you don’t mind me going out with Ben?” I asked later that night as we got ready for bed. “I feel like I’m abandoning you.”

“No, love. Go and have fun. I’ll stay at home and have … what does Ben call it? Sad single man pizza?” He dodged the pillow I threw at him and stretched out on the bed, deliberately putting himself on display for me in nothing but his boxers, the antlers of the stag on his hip peeking up above the waistband. 

“You’re just trying to make me feel sorry for you. I know you’ll be up all night, stuffing your face and playing that Halo game,” I said, admiring the golden tone the bedroom lights lent his skin. Something in my expression must have tipped him off because he took on a predatory expression, green eyes glittering. 

“Come here,” he whispered and feeling as if I was being pulled by a string, I did. Enfolded in his strong arms, I concentrated on the sensations of his hands on my body as he pushed up my tank top, his lips on mine at first and then down my neck to my breasts where he seized a nipple with his teeth, tugging gently before soothing with his tongue. 

I felt the slick heat between my legs and parted them for his hand, moaning into his mouth at his touch through my pajama bottoms and knickers. My own hands were far from idle, sweeping over the sweat-dampened skin of his back, trailing down to his arse and back up to rub my thumbs across his nipples, making them stand up in hard points as he growled his own satisfaction. 

My heart felt like it was liable to beat right out of my chest and I closed my eyes, lost in the swirl of colors against my eyelids. Harry’s voice was in my ear, hoarse with need as he muttered disjointed words and phrases between kisses. I felt him hot and hard against my leg as he ground himself against me and suddenly I felt like I couldn’t breathe. My heart had gone from the fast beat of desire to the frantic beat of a rabbit trying to get away from a fox and I fought against the urge to push Harry away from me. 

_Relax, relax,_ I repeated to myself. _It’s okay, nothing bad is going to happen. Harry is not going to hurt you, nothing is going to hurt you …_ But the specter of another failure, another lost child, loomed before me and I held my breath, throat tightening against heartache. 

“Gin?” I heard Harry ask and I opened my eyes to see him looking down at me, concern replacing the passion in his eyes. 

Unable to bear seeing the look of worry and disappointment on his face, I closed my eyes and shook my head. “Sorry,” I whispered, turning away from him onto my side and pulling my tank top back down. I felt his lips against the back of my neck, his breath still coming hard and my heart lurched when I felt the bed shift as he got out of it and left the room, closing the door softly behind him. 

It was a long time before I fell asleep and when I did, I dreamed of shadowing a dark-haired boy through the halls of Hogwarts, never quite able to see his face. 

The next couple of days were very subdued between us without even the small touches and kisses that had become the extent of the affection I could handle lately and it was with relief that I dressed to go out on Saturday night. Ben had warned me that I’d better not come out to what was likely to be our last night out in the City dressed like a frump, so I made more of an effort, going with dark skinny jeans and a silky, sleeveless blouse in a cream color that accentuated the color I’d managed to gain in California. In the back of the closet I found my gold high-heeled sandals and I looked at them, remembering that I’d worn them to that Ministry Christmas party where Harry and I had driven each other mad with jealousy before shagging each other’s brains out on a mat in the Auror training gym. 

I put them on, looking at the effect in the full-length mirror and nodded to myself. I’d never look tall, but I at least had the pretense of confidence. I picked up my light jacket and took a deep breath, heading out of the bedroom to let Harry know I was leaving. He wasn’t in the lounge, so I headed over to the bedroom we used as an office. I ignored the fact that we’d both hoped to be in the middle of converting it into a nursery by now.

“Hey,” I said, standing in the doorway, looking at Harry at his desk. He was peering intently at the giant computer screen he had hooked up to his laptop, probably in the middle of designing this year’s obstacle course. He looked up and raised his eyebrows, giving me a low wolf whistle and making me blush. “I’m, um, going to go, all right?”

He got up from his desk and stood in front of me in the doorway. Even in heels I was still shorter than him and he had to lean down a little to kiss me. “Be smart, be safe, be fast,” he said quietly.

“Of course.”

“You have cash? ID?” I patted my bra and smiled. “Good. Message me if you need me, yeah?”

“Yeah.” I kissed him on the cheek and turned to go, pausing when he caught my arm. I turned to look at him and he kissed me hard, forcing me to open my mouth to him as he bent me backwards. The kiss went on and my eyes fluttered closed as I clung to him, kissing him back just as hard. After what seemed like ages, we broke apart and I stood on shaky legs, watching as he wiped a bit of lipstick from the corner of his mouth, eyes dark. 

I took a deep breath and took out my lipstick and small mirror out of my bra, checking that he hadn’t wrecked my careful job. Putting my tools away, I shrugged on my jacket. “All right then. See you.” 

***  
I stood in the doorway of our office as she Apparated away, leaving me frustrated and aching, that kiss still tingling on my lips. I put my arms up, grabbing onto the lintel of the doorway and slumped forward, letting out a long breath. I swore to myself that I would let her work this out herself, that I would not pressure her in any way, shape, or form, but it’s been harder than I thought it would be. In my naïveté, I thought that after a couple of weeks we’d be back to our old easy intimacy. When she asked if we could stop trying for a baby, I didn’t realize she’d meant that we wouldn’t do anything at all.

“And then I send her out looking like that,” I murmured to the empty apartment. She’d looked gorgeous in those curve-hugging jeans and the silky top just sheer enough that I could barely see the lace of her bra. “I must be mad.” I briefly considered shadowing her, the monster in my chest roaring in vigorous agreement, but I ruthlessly shoved it down. That would be the exact wrong thing to do.

Why had I kissed her like that? I shook my head at myself. I knew exactly why. She was going out with someone else and even though I knew that she would be as safe as houses with Ben and the places they were going were more suited to his tastes than hers, I still wanted her to know that she was mine. _She knows, stupid. You don't need to go putting yourself all over her._

“Right. Pizza. And then I am going to fucking destroy some arseholes,” I said, clapping my hands together. A few minutes later, I was at our favorite New York-style pizzeria, having a beer while I waited for my pizza to come out of the oven. Across the way, I saw a table full of giggling girls surreptitiously looking my way and I looked down at my phone, watching them under my lashes. As I pretended to read email, one of their number nudged the girl that was looking directly at me and got an elbow in the side for her efforts. I’m self-aware enough to admit that the attention felt good.

Just as she was gathering her courage to walk past me on the way to the loo, my pizza was ready and I finished my beer, giving the girl a smile and a shrug as I left, grinning at her blush. Back home, I cracked open a Newcastle and dove into the pizza, making myself stop at half of it. The rest of the evening I spent logged into Halo, working out my frustration through deathmatches. 

I’d completely lost track of the time and was in the middle of a match against an excellent opponent when Ginny Apparated back into the lounge, looking like she’d had a very good time. “Harry!” she said, sounding happier than I'd heard her in a while. She tossed her jacket onto a chair and fell down onto the sofa next to me, pulling off the headset I’d been using to trash talk my opponents.

“I’m sorry, but Harry can’t play anymore. Good night!” she said sweetly into the microphone before tossing it onto the coffee table. I quit the game and set aside the controller before she got a chance to toss it across the room.

“Looks like you had a good night,” I said as she swung herself up to straddle my lap. I could smell the alcohol coming off of her.

“I had a wonderful night, thank you,” she leaned in to kiss me and I tasted the sweet remnant of whatever she’d drunk last. “How about you?”

“It was all right.” I glanced at the clock and saw that it was after two in the morning. So she and Ben had closed the bars. 

“Did you kill bad guys?” she asked, her voice a throaty purr as she nuzzled my neck.

“A few.” I shifted to get her up off my lap to coax her into bed, but she clung tightly to me.

“Nooo … it’s been so long since we’ve been naughty on the sofa,” she protested, settling more firmly onto my lap. The heat of her body against mine felt bloody fantastic.

“Gin, love, you’re utterly pissed,” I said gently as she began to pull up my tee shirt, sliding her hands along my skin. “Let’s get you into bed, all right?”

“Harry, I feel wonderful. Come on, let’s shag on the sofa.” Her hands grabbed for my glasses and I took them off before she could do it for me. She’d worked my shirt halfway up by now, rocking her hips against mine and my body couldn’t help but respond and she felt it. “You want to,” she said, leaning in to kiss me again.

I took hold of her wrists and gently pushed her backwards. “This sofa isn’t too comfortable for shagging, remember? Let’s go to bed and shag there, yeah?” She looked at me, alcohol-clouded eyes doubtful and then gave me a silly grin, nodding in agreement. Very carefully I stood up, putting my hands under her bum to lift her up with me. She wrapped her arms and legs around me, giggling madly as we entered the bedroom.

Setting her on the bed, I extricated her arms from around my neck as she showered me with sloppy kisses. I knelt down, carefully undoing the straps on her sandals and sliding them off her feet. She fell backwards, groaning loudly as she flexed her toes. Looking at her critically, I judged she wasn’t in danger of vomiting and I took off her trousers, raising my eyebrows at her lacy knickers. 

She’d grown quiet and I glanced at her as I set her trousers aside. She was looking at me, brown eyes solemn and I realized we were transitioning from happy drunk Ginny to sad drunk Ginny and I braced myself. “I don’t deserve you,” she said quietly as I helped her get on her pajama bottoms. 

“You don’t think so? Why not?” I asked conversationally, unbuttoning her blouse. 

She was quiet for a moment and then covered her face with her hands. “I can’t give you a family,” she said, voice muffled by her hands. I pulled them away from her face and she turned away from me, eyes shut tight. “You’ve never had a proper family and if there’s anyone who's ever deserved one, it’s you,” she mumbled.

Looking at her lying on the bed in her drunken sorrow, my heart broke for her and I stretched out next to her, gathering her close to me and putting my lips against her temple, making little shushing sounds. “No, love, you’re my family. You and Teddy, all right?” She shook harder, making little hiccuping sobs against my neck. 

_Is that what she really thinks about herself? That she's some sort of failure?_ I racked my memory, searching for some word or incident where I’d made her feel this way and I couldn’t recall one, but that didn’t mean anything. I could have easily put my foot in it without even realizing what I’d done. I knew that she was a very driven, intense person; becoming a fully-qualified Healer and then a Muggle doctor proved that. It was part of what attracted me to her—here was someone who could take my legend and shred it to bits through the sheer force of her own personality, leaving me free to be myself. 

I felt completely inadequate in that moment. Clearly, I hadn’t been doing enough and I resolved to do better. I’d been so wrapped up in the coming end of the school year and keeping Teddy on task for his finals that I hadn’t been paying enough attention to my wife who was dealing with her own transition. The end of her residency, her best friend moving on to the other end of the state, the pressure from Vijay to take the research position he’d basically created for her and on top of it all, trying to start a family of our own. _It’s too much,_ I thought as she began to quiet. 

I looked down at her and saw that she looked like she was genuinely asleep. Gently shifting her around, I managed to get her blouse and bra off and slide a tee shirt over her head without waking her. Undressing down to my boxers, I got into bed next to her, molding my body to hers. Teddy wasn’t due to be back home until late tomorrow afternoon. _We’ll have a lie-in and then do something fun, just the two of us._

***  
I opened my eyes and immediately closed them again as the cheerful sunlight stabbed me in the face, making my poor brain throb even worse. Groaning, I rolled over, pulling the covers over my head. What happened last night? I had vague memories of going out with Ben … we’d done a bit of a pub crawl and I’d drunk more than I had in a very long time. 

I remembered one bar where a boy had sent me several shots and I’d been happy enough to oblige him, downing them all, one after the other while Ben cheered me on. We moved on until the bars closed and we had no choice but to go home. And when I got home …

_Oh God. Did I really throw myself at Harry?_ Mortified, I remembered coming home and ripping the headset off of him, saying something stupid to the person on the other end and then plopping myself on his lap, practically begging him to shag me right there on the sofa. I groaned quietly and put one hand out to his side of the bed, relieved to find it empty. Cautiously, I poked my head out of the covers, squinting against the sunlight as my head pounded in time to my pulse. 

On the bedside table were a huge glass of water and a flask of potion. A sign that said “Drink Us” in Harry’s hand was propped up against the glass and I sat up with a sigh. The inside of my mouth felt as dry as the Sahara Desert and tasted twice as bad. “Bottoms up,” I said, lifting the glass and drinking it all in one go. I uncorked the flask and the astringent smell of the Hangover Potion made me wrinkle my nose, but I drank it down anyway, wishing I’d saved some of the water to wash the taste out of my mouth.

I sat very still, waiting for the potion to do its work, gradually feeling my headache recede and my thoughts clear. _I had that dream again,_ I thought with a frown. _Hogwarts, that boy …_ I’d begun feeling haunted by him, tantalized by the near glimpses I’d gotten of his face. I was convinced it was Harry in the dream, but I would have expected to see my brother and Hermione with him. 

_Or … wait a minute._ I concentrated very hard, struggling to recall Divination lessons that I hadn’t paid much attention to on dreams. Eyes closed, I took several deep breaths until I felt a sort of calmness wash over me and thought about the dream, trying to recall the visuals. I remembered being in the Great Hall during a mealtime and really focused, trying to recall everything about it. The candles, the house tables, the professors at the high table. Neville was there and Hermione, but sitting next to Hermione was … _Who? Someone who doesn’t belong._ I held my breath, trying to sink deeper into the memory of the dream and I saw her. Stunningly beautiful with rich brown hair and fathomless eyes exactly as I remembered. She seemed to be the only person in the dream to perceive me as I stood in the middle of the Great Hall and she smiled at me, giving me such a feeling of warmth that I felt my skin prickle.

_Marella!_ My eyes opened and I was almost disoriented to find myself back in my bedroom with Stuart nudging my shoulder. I patted him absently as I mulled over Marella’s presence in my dream of the boy. I hadn’t thought of her and Rònan in years. Why was she on my mind now? 

I thought of her words to me the night we parted, there on the beach. _If there is ever a time ye have need of me, get to yonder rock or the ruins and call my name and I’ll come, aye?_ “What do I need her for?” I asked the cat as he purred contentedly. “You don’t know, you’re a cat.”

Feeling energized now that I had solved one riddle about my recurring dream, I got out of bed, feeling only a little bit wobbly. Snape may have given him shit, but my husband brewed a first-rate Hangover Potion. Running my hand through my hair, I realized I was sticky and disgusting with alcohol sweat and I headed into the shower. _I think I’ll make a trip out to the Sutro Baths today,_ I thought as the hot water hit my bare skin.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ginny meets with an old friend.

I stood on the cliff, looking down at the ruins of the once-glorious Sutro Baths. The San Francisco June Gloom had yet to set in, so it was a sunny day, but the wind coming off the ocean was fierce and I burrowed deeper into my jacket as I began the hike down. The site was deserted, which was good because I really didn’t need anyone to see me talking to a seal.

Reaching the ruins, I paused and looked around, gazing out to sea at the rocks that were constantly pounded by the relentless waves. I could see some seals lounging around, their barks carried to me by the wind. Was Marella even out there? I supposed I’d find out soon enough. 

I walked out onto the concrete peninsula that stuck out into the larger pool and sat down, remembering the first time I’d done this nearly six years ago when Rònan had begged me to find his wife and return her to him. There on the cold concrete, I gathered my thoughts, focusing on the selkie I wanted to call. “Marella,” I said quietly, “it’s Ginny Weasley. You said if there was ever anything you could do for me to call for you.” I looked out to the rocks again, trying to see if there was any movement among the seals grouped there. “So, I’m calling for you. Please come.”

Not sure what else I needed to do, I sat and waited, huddling against the cold wind. Alone with nothing but my thoughts to entertain me, I remembered this morning with a wince. Awkward was not an adequate enough word to describe Harry and me, but it was the only one I could think of. In the shower, more of what I’d done and said last night came back to me in horrifying clarity and I just wanted to sink into the drain out of sheer embarrassment.

“You’re a grown woman. Time to face the music,” I said once I was clean and dressed. I’d been half-expecting Harry to come and check on my progress, but he hadn’t and I was half glad and half miffed about it. 

I opened the door of our bedroom and the smell of bacon hit me in the face, making my stomach lurch a little, but Harry’s excellent potion kept me from being sick right there in the doorway. He was on the sofa, typing away on his laptop, Sunday morning news providing a quiet background. “You’re up,” he said, closing the lid and standing up with a stretch. “How are you feeling?”

“Fine,” I said, sidling toward the kitchen and the covered plate I saw on the breakfast bar. There was a pot of tea kept at the perfect temperature and I poured a cup, inhaling the scent. Harry put the cream out on the bar for me and I spent as long as I possibly could doctoring my tea to perfection before I looked up at him.

“Made you a plate. Just some eggs and a bit of bacon,” he said diffidently. “Unless you want something else?”

“No, this is fine.” I took the cover off the plate and picked up a piece of bacon, nibbling on it as he watched me over his glasses, arms crossed as he leaned against the cabinets. “I’m not going to throw up if that’s what you’re wondering.”

“I didn’t think you were,” he said with a raised eyebrow. “You had a good time last night with Ben?”

“We did,” I said cautiously, sampling the eggs.

“Did he get home all right?”

“I assume so. He met a man at the last place we were at. I dunno where they ended up.” I shrugged and ate more bacon, pleased that things seemed to be staying down. “I expect I’ll get a text from him soon.” Harry continued to watch me eat, making me feel like I was a sample under a microscope. “Can I help you?” I finally asked.

He opened his mouth and then closed it, shaking his head. “I, uh, wanted to see if you felt like getting out today? Do something fun? Maybe go up to Mt Tam?”

Now it was my turn to open and then close my mouth. “That sounds lovely, but I have some things I need to do today,” I finally said. 

“Yeah, all right. We should probably go when Teddy’s here, anyway.” He turned away, shifting around some things in the sink, shoulders tense. “Gin, have I done something or said something …?” he finally asked.

My heart started to pound and I pushed my plate away. What else had I done that I wasn’t remembering? “No, why?”

Back still to me, he shrugged. “No reason. You know how sometimes I can say stupid stuff.”

_You’re not the only one,_ I thought. “No, love. You’ve been brilliant.” Hopping off the barstool, I went over to him, putting my arms around him and leaning into his warmth. I felt him take a deep breath and then exhale slowly. “I’m sorry I haven’t been myself.”

He turned around in my arms and I rested my head against his chest, listening to his heart. “Have I been making you feel ignored? The end of the school year is always so hectic, Teddy has his own exams … and Ben is leaving, your residency is ending. You’ve been under a lot of stress.”

I thought about what he said. He wasn’t wrong, but none of it was his fault and I told him so. “I’m going to spend some time today to get my head right, okay?” I said, briefly wondering why I didn’t just tell him I was planning on contacting Marella. _Just in case it doesn’t pan out. I don’t want to get his hopes up,_ I thought, not really thinking too much about whose hopes I was more worried about.

And here I was, shivering on the cold concrete in spite of the bright sun. I closed my eyes, visualizing Marella as I’d last seen her once Abraham Langston’s glamour had been banished by the power of her sealskin and the sea. Tall, finely-featured and regal, she stood next to her husband, Rònan, himself the picture of a powerful, graceful man. Recalling the enticing glint in his gray eyes, I felt a shiver in my belly. 

It was one of his whiskers that formed the core of one of the three wands that resided in a drawer in our closet. All three were made out of the cypress wood gifted to Harry by the former dryad he’d released from that terrible curse, albeit too late to save her. When Ollivander presented them to us, I’d hoped one of them would be called to me, disappointed when none of them were.

Ollivander had simply smiled his kind smile and patted my hand. “Perhaps one day their owners will make themselves known,” he’d said. 

_One day,_ I thought, eyes still closed. Hearing a small splash, I opened my eyes, squinting in the bright light to see a sleek, brown seal bobbing in the water in front of me. “Marella?” I whispered, suddenly aware of my hummingbird tattoo tingling.

“Aye,” the seal said in Marella’s beautiful voice. “It’s so good to see ye again, Ginny Weasley.” 

It was strange to hear the words coming out of the seal’s mouth in a voice I remembered so well and I experienced a moment of vertigo as the selkie’s human face briefly superimposed itself over the seal’s in my vision. I shook my head, seeing just the seal once more. “It’s wonderful to see you too, Marella. Have you been well? How is Rònan?”

“You’re sweet to ask! He is doing well and sends his regards.”

“He didn’t come with you?”

“Och, no. He’s with the pups. They’re at the height of their deviltry now and must be watched close, ye ken?”

I laughed, thinking of Teddy. “I know what you mean. We have an adolescent in the house and it’s been interesting.”

Marella spun around in the water, blowing out a spray of mist in surprise. “D’ye mean to tell me it’s been that long since I’ve seen ye last?”

“No, he’s not ours. He’s our godson, so I suppose he’s sort of ours. He’s living with us and going to St Ambrose’s,” I explained, amazed at the array of expressions that Marella’s seal face managed to display.

“Ah! Tell me, d’ye have any news of my Moira and Morgan?” she said, asking about the Langston children that she had nannied for after their mother passed away. 

“Oh, I do! Harry keeps me updated on them,” I said, telling her everything I knew about the Langston children’s school careers at St Ambrose’s. “Scottie should be starting in the fall of this year,” I finished as she listened intently, bobbing slowly up and down in the still pool. 

“I’ve missed my wee poppets so,” she said with wistful affection. She continued to float in front of me, dark eyes far away. “It’s good to hear they’re flourishing and coming into their magic.” Fixing me with an apologetic look, she managed to give me a sheepish smile. “And I haven’t asked about your Harry. How is he?”

“He’s good. He loves teaching, he’s great with his godson. We’re five years married this past Christmas,” I said, not really sure if she would understand what time of year that meant.

“Married! That’s wonderful! I knew it as soon as I saw ye together that ye were meant for each other.” She gave a playful splash of water with her flipper. “And how many bairns have ye?” she asked, making my heart give a little stutter.

“Well, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” I said. I took a deep breath. “We’ve been having some trouble in that department and I don’t know what to do.” I told her everything that had happened, starting with the early miscarriages to the chromosomal abnormalities that had ended the last one. “I didn’t want to wait to miscarry that one. I had a procedure to end it,” I said, feeling a surge of panic at the memory of waking up afterwards, knowing I wasn’t pregnant anymore. I’d curled up in a ball and cried so hard I almost threw up.

Marella listened quietly until I ran out of words, swimming gracefully back and forth in front of me, motion that I found oddly soothing. “Och, Ginny Weasley, it’s sad I am to hear of your troubles,” she said quietly.

“And now, whenever Harry and I … get close … I get so afraid of what might happen that I just freeze up.” I felt the sting of tears in my eyes and I blinked rapidly, hoping to make them go away. “I love him so much and I just wish I knew what was wrong with me.”

Marella swam closer, looking at me with those lambent eyes. “Ginny Weasley, sometimes these things come in their own time. I doubt there is owt wrong with ye.”

“How can you be sure? When I was eleven, there was this diary, a horrible, nasty thing with a Dark soul trapped inside. I was a stupid little girl and it possessed me.” My throat closed around the words as I voiced my deepest fear. “What if it tainted me? What if it took away my ability to have healthy children?”

The selkie’s face took on a distressed aspect and she looked like she wanted to hug me, settling for swimming back and forth in front of me once more. “No, no,” she crooned as if she were soothing a child, “Lord Voldemort had terrible powers, but making ye barren wasn’t one of them.”

Shocked to hear her say that name, I looked at her open-mouthed. “How—”

“That man’s evil touched every aspect of the magical world,” she said solemnly. “Selkies and others of our sort went into hiding until your Harry finally rid the world of his stain.”

“Then why? I’ve been looked at six ways from Sunday and no one can find anything wrong. Everything is in perfect working order. Neither one of us are carriers for any genetic diseases and my mum’s had seven children,” I said, frustration rising. “What is my problem?”

She gave an oddly human shrug and twirled in the water, sending ripples out from her torpedo-shaped body. “Mayhap there is nothing wrong with either of ye. The making of bairns has ever been fraught and the first one can be the most difficult to catch.” A teasing smile and cock of one whiskery eyebrow gave her a rakish look. “If it weren’t for the fun involved, there are those that say we’d never bother!”

I felt a flood of embarrassment as she slapped the water with her flipper at her own joke. “Well, there hasn’t been too much fun lately, either.” 

“Now that is too bad. As I recall, your Harry would turn even a selkie’s head. As for yourself, my Rònan teased me endlessly about shedding his skin and coming to find ye!” At this declaration, I felt another flood of heat to my face, sure I was as red as a beet, Marella practically dancing in the water in front of me as I laughed out loud. I held the image of Rònan’s human form in my mind, mentally comparing him to Harry. _Hm, don’t think I’d kick him out of bed for eating crackers,_ I thought.

The laughter felt good and I was grateful to Marella for interjecting some humor into what had become a weighty discussion, but I still wanted to know if there was anything she could do to help my situation. “So, do you think you can help us?” I asked when I ran out of laughter.

She considered me with depthless eyes for several moments before giving a short nod. “Aye, I think I can,” she said and I felt as if I’d been zapped by electricity.

“Oh! Oh, that’s wonderful! What do I need to do? When can we start? Should I Summon Harry? I can get him here very quickly,” I said getting my wand out, ready to touch it to my tattoo.

“Slow down, sweetling. There is naught to be done today,” she said in an amused voice. I fought to keep the disappointment off my face as she continued to look at me, nostrils flaring wide. “You’re coming into your most fertile time, but you’re no there yet.” She took several more deep breaths. “I make it five more days, aye?” I nodded, doing my own calculation, startled to realize that she was right. 

“The three nights of the full moon will be your best time. I’ll come ashore and seek ye out and then we’ll see what may be done.” She sounded confident and I felt a profound relief. 

“Thank you. Should I meet you here?”

“Nay, I’ll find ye.” She looked at me sternly. “Now, we’ve got ye covered, but as for your Harry, ye’ll need to make sure he keeps his hands off of ye as well as himself, aye?”

This conversation was turning out to be far more embarrassing than I’d ever dreamed and I felt myself coloring again. Our respective wanking habits were not something we’d ever discussed, regarding it as mutual private time. “Um, I’ll let him know.” 

Marella looked at me, an obvious pride on her seal face. “Ye’ll make a wonderful mother, Ginny Weasley, just ye wait and see!” She turned her head out toward the sea and the crashing waves. “I hear my Rònan calling me back. I must go. I’ll seek ye out on the first eve of the full moon, aye?”

“Aye … I mean, yes. Do we need to have anything … prepared?” I asked, thinking of any potion ingredients or other esoteric spell components.

“Och, no. Just yourselves. Mayhap ye’ll want to lay in some supplies—ye may not feel like leaving the house for a few days!” She slapped the water with her flipper again and leaped in a graceful arc before sliding under the water without a single ripple. A moment later, I saw a sleek shape cutting through the waves, arrowing straight for the rocks. I shook my head, unable to figure out how she managed to pass from the pool out into the open sea.

I sat on the concrete for a little while longer, going over the conversation in my head. _She said she could help us,_ I thought, a feeling of profound relief washing over me. I felt as if a heavy rock had been stuck in my chest and suddenly went away, enabling me to breathe free once more. Standing up on numb legs, I looked back out to the rocks, convinced I saw a mottled-gray seal jump out of the water and flick his tail at me. 

The rest of the afternoon I spent in a coffee shop, trying to get warm again with a steady stream of hot, caffeinated drinks. I sent a text to Harry letting him know that I was all right and that I’d be home soon. _To tell you to keep your hands off yourself, I thought wryly. Five days. That makes the first night of the full moon Friday. What are we going to do about Teddy?_ I wasn’t sure of exactly what Marella’s help would entail and I didn’t feel like explaining to a fifteen-year-old boy that his godfather and I were inviting another woman into our bedroom to help us have a baby. 

I spent a bit of time texting with Ben, asking him how he was feeling and if there was anything I could bring him. _Do you have any of that marvelous hangover stuff Harry makes?_ he asked, the pleading tone managing to come through.

_No, love. I’m not at home right now. I can bring you some of that sports drink._

_Ugh, that stuff is vile. I’ll be all right. I had a big greasy breakfast._

_Oh? Was it a breakfast you cooked yourself?_

_Maaaaaaaaaaybe._

_I see. Was it possibly in a kitchen you were unfamiliar with?_

_Maaaaaaaaaaybe._

I waited patiently and was shortly rewarded.

_OMG, Ginny. His name is Mark and he’s an EMT! We already have so much in common!_

_Does this mean you’re not abandoning me for LA after all?_

_Girl, please. A good EMT can get work anywhere. Maybe I’ll ask how he would like being a kept man?_ I grinned at the thought of Ben having a house husband. I knew that no one else would ever be able to live up to his cleaning standards. _Gotta go. Will give you dirty deets at lunch tomorrow. LOVE YOU!_

_Well, at least one of us got lucky last night,_ I thought as I put my phone away and got my things together. I was still mortified at how I’d thrown myself at Harry in my drunken state.

When I got home, Teddy was already back from his weekend at Duncan’s. “Ginny!” he said as soon as he saw me. “Alex was trying to tell us that Muggles have a disease that makes your, um, bits fall off. Is that true? I told them that it had to be fake, but Alex said he’d heard his older brother talking about it to a friend that was dating a Muggle!” 

I looked at Harry and he only shrugged helplessly. “I told him there was no such thing, but you’re the doctor.”

“Teddy, you tell that Alex that I said there is no such disease that will make your bits fall off,” I said, hanging up my jacket. 

“I knew it!” he said triumphantly, reaching for his phone, presumably to tell off Alex.

“But, there are some diseases you can catch that will make you wish your bits would fall off. And not just from Muggles, mind,” I said, fixing him with a gimlet eye. “I don’t want you spreading tales about Muggles. They’re not true and it’s not right.”

Teddy had the decency to squirm and look uncomfortable under my gaze and he nodded. “I told Alex he was wrong, but the other guys thought it was all true,” he mumbled defensively.

“Maybe I’ll have Harry talk to Mr Ashborough about me coming to the school and giving a bit of a talk, then,” I said, smiling when he blanched and his hair color shifted from its usual sandy brown to bright green. Teddy didn’t respond, deciding to retreat to his room instead, my mad cackle following him down the hall.

“You’re evil,” Harry murmured as he hugged me from behind.

“Honestly, where do they get these ideas?” I said, enjoying the feeling of his arms around me.

“They’re a bunch of randy, teenage boys. What do you think they talk about when they get together?” He placed a gentle kiss on my neck just behind my ear. “Have a good day?”

_Did you get your head right?_ was the unspoken question and I nodded to both. “I did.” I took a deep breath before I said, “I talked to Marella.”

“Marella? The selkie?” Harry asked after a moment.

“Yeah.” I disengaged myself from his embrace and turned to face him. “Do you remember what I told you she said when we helped her? How she said if there was ever anything she could do to repay us for getting her back to her family?” Harry nodded, a slight frown on his face. “Well, I thought maybe she could help us with our current … difficulty and she says she can.”

He looked at me like he was trying to decide if I’d taken complete leave of my senses or not. “How?” he finally asked.

“I don’t know. She didn’t say. She said that I would be coming into my most fertile time in five days and she’d find me then,” I said, fully aware of how mad it all sounded.

“That’s it? She’ll come find us … what? Friday?”

“I guess. I asked if we needed anything. Anything for a potion or spell components and she said no.” I shrugged and looked up at Harry, smiling at his skeptical expression. “What could it hurt?” I put my hands on his hips and pulled him into mine. “We’ll at least get a good shag or two out of it, won’t we?”

Harry snorted and shook his head. “All right. But if she shows up with Rònan, I’m out.”

Feeling better and more at ease than I had in months, I went up on my tiptoes and kissed him. “One more thing,” I whispered, “you’re in a no-wank zone for the next few days.”

“Am I? What about you?” he murmured against my lips.

“I can do whatever I want. Marella didn’t say I couldn’t.”

“What if I want to watch?”

Putting my arms around his neck, I looked up into his eyes, seeing a playfulness that had been absent for too long. “Do you think you could possibly watch me without touching yourself?”

“Challenge accepted,” he said, lips crashing down on mine.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marella comes for a visit.

The phone in my pocket had buzzed several times now, but I wasn’t really in a situation where I could take it out and look at it. I knew it wasn’t Teddy because he was sitting right in front of me as I lectured on counter curses. _If it’s really an emergency, she’ll send her Patronus,_ I thought as it buzzed again. 

The bell finally rang for lunch and the kids shuffled around, chattering about their plans for the weekend as they headed out into the sunny day. Teddy and Duncan were looking forward to the weekend camping trip to Angel Island Duncan’s dad was taking them on. They were leaving today after Duncan’s dad got off work and wouldn’t be back until late Sunday afternoon, which neatly solved a problem for Ginny and me.

Marella was due to show up sometime this evening and I was feeling a bit on edge about it. I still didn’t know what was going to happen and I didn’t like not knowing. Ginny was the calmest I’d seen her in ages, for which I was very grateful, but … 

The phone buzzed again and I fished it out of my pocket, raising my eyebrows at the half dozen messages from Ginny. _What in blazes …?_ I thought as I went to the messaging app. 

_Harry, just wanted to check on you and see how you’re doing. Love you._

_No response? You must be doing just fine then._

_Or are you? Hmm … maybe you’re too busy thinking about me to respond?_

_You’re not being naughty, are you? You know what Marella said …_

_Luckily, I don’t have the same problem. I can think about you as much as I want and do whatever I want._

_I don’t have rounds for another half hour. Maybe I’ll find an empty room?_

“Jesus Christ,” I murmured, “she’s trying to kill me.” Just then another message buzzed through, this one a picture. A picture of a pair of breasts I was well familiar with in a very lacy bra that did absolutely nothing to lessen my current predicament. _You are going to get me in trouble,_ I quickly messaged back.

_Oh, so you are getting these! I was rather hoping I hadn’t just sent my tits to a stranger!_

_You shouldn’t have sent them at all! Gin, I’ve been in front of a class for the last hour with this bloody thing going off in my pocket._

_Sounds dirty. Did my messages … stimulate you?_

I blew out a breath through my nose. _No._

_Are you dressed left or right today? Which pocket did you have your phone in?_

_Bloody hell, woman! _I sent back, easily envisioning her delighted smile. _You better watch yourself.___

_Or what? Will you give me a detention? Make me write lines? I’m sure I can find an old school skirt somewhere …_

A vision of an adult Ginny in a Hogwarts uniform swam in front of me and I shook my head, banishing memories of watching her in the common room without seeming to. _You’re the worst._

Another image came through, this one of her making an exaggerated sad face, lower lip thrust out in an extreme pout. I could see a shelf of cleaning supplies behind her. At least she wasn’t being ridiculous out in the middle of the hospital. _Two can play at this game,_ I thought. Feeling like an idiot, I summoned my best teacher glare, letting my glasses slip a bit further down my nose and took a picture, sending it before I could chicken out.

_Oh my. ::sploosh::_

_Sploosh?_

_Things have suddenly become quite damp._

I grinned. Mission accomplished. _Oh, God. I did not need to know that._

_Liar. Maybe I’ll send you a pic of something else …_

_You’re just trying to get me in trouble with Marella._

_I would never. It might be interesting to see what punishment she’d come up with though!_

I laughed out loud and shook my head. _Listen, love, I’ve got to get going or Juanita’s going to send out a search party, all right?_

_And it wouldn’t do to have her find you in your current state, I’m sure._

_No, it wouldn’t. I’m going to have to start naming Chudley Cannons Seekers to make myself presentable._

_Aw, too bad you can’t take things into your own hands. :(_

_Indeed._ These past few days had been a bit torturous. With the promise of Marella’s help, it was as if a giant weight had lifted from Ginny and she’d been very playful and flirty all week. It was a very welcome change, but the no sex or wanking prohibition had made it very challenging. _I’d rather be in your hands, anyway._

_Why, Mr Potter! I should report you to the Headmaster for cheek!_

_I’ll just tell him about your unsolicited tit pics._

_And I thought you were a gentleman. Oops, I’m being paged. I’ll see you tonight. Love you._

_Love you._ I shut off the screen of the phone and put it back in my pocket. _Right then. Seekers. Derek Marlsby, Robbie Gibbins, Terrence Stoughton … bloody useless, that one. Malfoy was better. Gordon Jones …_

That afternoon, I was in the middle of helping Teddy get ready for the weekend when Ginny came home much earlier than usual. “What’s all this?” she called from the kitchen. Poking my head out of Teddy’s room, I saw she was going through the shopping bags I’d left on the breakfast bar.

“Just a few things we were short on,” I said with a shrug. Ginny looked at me skeptically and lifted one of the bottles of sports drink out of a bag. I felt my face turn red and turned back to Teddy.

“Oh, and protein bars, too!” she said with false delight. I heard the rustle of a wrapper as she unwrapped one to sample. “This is delicious,” she said, coming into the room. “You should take some of these with you, love.”

“I have some in here already,” Teddy said, opening up his backpack to show her the bars and bottles of the drink. “Harry said they’re good for hiking.”

“Did he?” she said, giving me a saucy smile. “Well, we must be going to do some hiking this weekend ourselves to get through all of those!”

“All right. That should be everything, yeah?” I held up my hand, counting off on my fingers, pointedly ignoring my grinning wife. “Sleeping bag, toiletries, snacks, clothes?”

“Check, check, check and check. Oh, wait.” Teddy grabbed a complicated-looking wooden box off of his desk and shoved it into the bag. “I haven’t shown Duncan my new puzzle yet.”

“You have your phone? I don’t know how good the service is out there,” Ginny said, sounding a little bit anxious. We’d been camping together loads of times, but this was the first time he was going to be spending a couple of nights out of doors without one of us with him.

Teddy slapped the back pocket of his shorts and hefted his backpack onto his shoulder. “We’re taking the ferry out! It won’t be as good as Mr Ashborough’s sailboat, but I’ll take what I can get!” he said with a grin. 

Outside, I heard a knock on the door and Teddy shot out of the room. “That’s them!” he yelled over his shoulder, throwing open the door. Marella stood there, looking just as amazing as when she’d gone back to the sea. I’d seen her only briefly without the glamour and it had been mostly dark out on the beach, so this was my first time getting a really good look at her.

She was tall, almost as tall as me with eyes the color of green sea glass. I had been half-afraid that she’d show up just wrapped in her sealskin, but she was clothed in a sort of gauzy top and light brown trousers, though I noticed she was barefoot. On her shoulder she had an enormous tote bag and my nose told me her sealskin was in it. Her rich, brown hair tumbled down over her shoulders, lending her an almost Lady Godiva air.

“Hello! Ye must be Teddy! I’ve heard so much about ye!” she said in her warm, Scots-tinged voice. 

“Uh,” was all Teddy could muster as his hair turned bright pink in surprise. 

“Marella!” Ginny said warmly, rescuing our godson as she invited the selkie woman into the apartment past our Blood Seal. The two women embraced with genuine affection while Teddy continued to stare. I put my hand on his shoulder and drew him away. 

“Harry, who is that?” he whispered, voice full of wonder.

“An old friend of ours, come over for dinner,” I said heartily. _I hope Duncan and his dad show up soon._ I didn’t want to find out what would happen to Teddy with prolonged exposure to the un-glamoured selkie. 

“Harry,” Marella said, turning the full force of her smile on me. I felt my mouth go dry and I tried unsuccessfully to swallow. She enfolded me in her arms and I smelled the scents of the sea all around. 

“Marella,” I managed to croak when she let go of me, catching sight of Ginny’s amused smile behind her. “So glad you could join us tonight.”

“Och, it’s wonderful to see ye both again. How could I stay away?” she said easily. “And it’s pleased I am to make your acquaintance, Teddy.”

“Uh, glad to meet you, too,” the poor boy said, awkwardly sticking out his hand for her to shake. She rejected it and hugged him instead, practically making his eyes bug out and his hair turn white. 

There was another knock at the door and I answered it this time, revealing Duncan and his father. “Auror Sutton,” I said with a nod, inviting the both of them in. 

“Harry,” Sutton said, doing a double take at the sight of the selkie settling herself on our sofa while Ginny brought her a glass of water. He raised an eyebrow at me and I shrugged.

“Old friend of Gin’s,” I explained. 

“All right, then. Teddy ready to go?”

I looked over at the boys who were whispering together and staring at Marella. “Teddy, all set?”

“Huh? Yeah,” he said distractedly. I saw him concentrate and his hair settled down to its usual sandy brown. 

Ginny gave him a hug of her own. “You mind Mr Sutton, all right? I don’t want to see his Patronus with news that you’ve been playing up,” she said, her smile belying her stern tone.

“Ginny, when have I ever gotten in trouble?” he said, recovering some of his natural charm.

“I’ll have a list ready for you when you get back.” She turned to look at Duncan and hugged him as well. “That goes double for you.”

Auror Sutton took the boys in hand, ushering them out of the door, casting another look at Marella and then at me. No doubt there would be questions the next time we went out for a beer with Archimedes.

“It was nice to meet you, Marella,” Teddy said with a wave as he shuffled out of the door.

The selkie smiled at him, making his hair ripple with color once more. “It was wonderful meeting you, too. Mayhap our paths will cross again one day.”

“Have a great time,” I said, shutting the door in Teddy’s face. Turning around, I leaned against it and let out a long breath. _Save me from hormonal teenagers._

“He’s a wonderful boy,” Marella said fondly. “Ye say he’s not yours?”

“No, his parents both died in the war not too long after he was born. Harry is his godfather and his grandmother raised him until we brought him to California to go to St Ambrose’s,” Ginny said quietly. 

Without the distraction of the boys and getting them on their way, the three of us just sort of looked at each other and I could very nearly see a giant elephant sitting in the corner of the room. I shook my head and left the door. “So. Is anyone hungry?”

Several hours later, we sipped wine on the rooftop terrace of our building, the lights of the Golden Gate Bridge shining softly in the distance. The full moon hung high in the sky, making the lights on the terrace almost unnecessary. 

I glanced over toward Angel Island, relieved to see that it hadn’t gone up in flames. _I guess they’re doing okay, then,_ I thought with a smile. Ginny was curled up next to me on the lounger and I had my arm around her shoulders, enjoying her closeness.

“This is a wonderful spot ye’ve found for yourselves,” Marella sighed, setting her wineglass down on the wooden patio table. 

“It really is a great spot,” Ginny said, finishing her own wine. “I suppose we have Weatherbee to thank for it. If it weren’t for him, we’d probably still be in that studio flat above the Chinese.”

“Unlikely. We knew we had Teddy coming, didn’t we?” The wine had given me a delightful relaxed feeling and I reveled in the lack of tension in my gut. “We would have moved on eventually.”

“But we might not have found this place.” Ginny put her arms around me and burrowed closer.

“That’s true.” I finished my wine, but held onto my glass, unwilling to move from my comfortable position. 

Marella looked at us, a smile playing on her lips and she let out another sigh. “Seeing the two of ye there together just makes me so happy. I imagine the marriage of Harry Potter was quite the event, no?”

I felt a flush rise to my face at the mention of our wedding. We had both just wanted something small, but Molly wasn’t having it. “My only daughter will not sneak off into the night to get married,” she’d said, completely adamant that we would have a wedding to be remembered. _And did we ever._

“Oh, it was amazing,” Ginny said, her voice full of memories. “We were already handfast when you met us, so we would have been happy with a simple ceremony a year and a day from the handfasting, but you know mums.”

“Aye, I do.” Marella smiled again, turning her gaze inward and I wondered if she was remembering her own marriage. Did selkies even get married? She called Rònan her husband, but what exactly did that mean? I resolved to do more research on the creatures. I still wasn’t really too sure how she planned to help us conceive a child.

Almost as if she’d read my mind, Marella leaned forward, reaching for Ginny’s hand over the small table. “Now, it’s getting late and ye have work to do.” She brought Ginny’s hand to her nose and took a deep breath, nostrils flaring wider than a regular human’s ought to be able to. Eyes closed, she seemed to hold her breath for a moment before giving a short nod. “Aye, ye’ve entered your best time, sweetling.”

“Oh, good,” Ginny said, sounding breathless.

“Your turn.” Marella held out her hand to me and I held out my left hand to her, feeling a small jolt when she took it in both of hers. She leaned in and took another deep breath, holding it for several moments before she opened those sea green eyes and smiled at me. “Ye’ve been very good this week,” she said, that smile giving me a burst of nervousness in the pit of my stomach.

I grunted and Ginny giggled, hugging me tighter. “Sorry I didn’t make it easier on you, love,” she said, sounding not a bit sorry.

Marella’s eyes sparkled and her grin widened as she let go of my hand and patted my knee. “And now we’ll see to your reward. Come on.” She stood up and gave a mighty stretch, exposing a creamy expanse of skin as her blouse rode up. 

Gathering up the wineglasses, I followed her and Ginny back down into our apartment. The buzz generated by the wine was gone, replaced by what felt like an entire swarm of butterflies in my stomach. I looked at the open bottle on the counter and poured us all another half glass, finishing it. We raised our glasses in a silent toast and drained them together. 

Marella set her glass on the breakfast bar and turned to her tote, carefully drawing out her luxuriously thick sealskin. As she did, the smells of the sea permeated the apartment; mud, salt and clean fresh air. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, transported back to that tiny hut on the rock that Uncle Vernon thought he could hide me away from the Wizarding world on. _One of the best days of my life …_ Opening my eyes, I saw Ginny had hers closed as well and I wondered what the scent of Marella’s sealskin evoked in her. 

Tossing the skin over her arm, the selkie smiled at us both. “Shall we?” she asked, leading the way to our bedroom. The fluttering of butterflies in my stomach intensified and I took Ginny’s hand as we followed her down the hall. I could tell from the look on Ginny’s face that she was having some of her own butterflies as well.

In the room, Marella took a moment to look at the pictures we had on the wall, reaching out to touch the glass covering one of Teddy on a skateboard at a local skate park. “It’s a wonderful life ye have together,” she said, looking at Ginny. “If ye never have a child of your own, that doesn’t make it any less.”

Her words sent a frisson through me and I heard Ginny let out a breath of surprise. These last months had been so wrapped up in trying to have a baby that I had quite forgotten that we’d had perfectly fine lives before we’d ever made the decision to embark on this madness. The reminder felt necessary.

“Now, let’s see what we can do about that.” Her demeanor became very businesslike and she spread the sealskin on the bed, covering the king-sized mattress. _That skin is bigger than it ought to be,_ I thought, dazzled by the rich, earthy brown color that shone in the light of the bedroom lamps. She stood in front of us and for a dizzying moment I thought she was going to take off her clothes, but she simply held her hands out to us, grasping our free hands tightly. Bowing her head, she made a short speech in what sounded like Gaelic.

_“Gus thu mo leanabh, mo chorp a tha fosgailte,_   
_Gus thu mo leanabh, mo inntinn a tha e fosgailte._   
_Gus thu mo leanabh, mo chridhe tha e fosgailte._   
_Le Talamh, teine, Gaoithe, agus Mhuir,_   
_Tighinn a-steach mo gàirdeanan bidh thu.”_

“What was that?” Ginny asked before I could. I stood very still, alert to any strange feelings or impulses, trying to be conscious of any odd tingling from my tattoo. I knew selkies had some intrinsic magic being magical creatures, but it didn’t seem as if she’d actually cast any spell.

“Just a simple blessing for your success.” She smiled again and let go of our hands. “Now, it’s time I took my leave of ye.”

“You’re just going to leave?” Ginny asked, sounding alarmed. 

“Aye, unless ye were wantin’ supervision?” Marella said with an arched eyebrow.

I grinned when Ginny flushed red, glad it wasn’t me for once. “No, we don’t need supervision, you just never said exactly what would happen and I thought … maybe …” she said, trailing off as Marella’s smile got wider and wider before she finally gave up and covered her face with her hands in embarrassment. 

“Aye well, as I’ve said before ye are a very bonny couple and if it were any other time I’d take ye up on your kind offer, but now is not the right time, sweetling.” She hugged Ginny tightly and whispered something in her ear that made her giggle. 

_Holy Jesus,_ I thought. The butterflies in my stomach suddenly felt more like Mothra. “So, uh, what do we do then?” I asked, since that essential question had still gone unanswered. 

“Just do what comes naturally to ye and make sure ye sleep under me skin for the next two nights of the full moon,” she said airily, as if making love and sleeping underneath a selkie’s skin was something that was done every day. _And maybe in some places it is,_ I thought, relieved that there wasn’t anything more esoteric involved. 

“Where are you going to go? You can stay in Teddy’s room if you want to,” Ginny said as she followed Marella out of the bedroom.

“Another kind offer, but ye’ve no need to worry about me. I have a place to go.” She shouldered her tote bag and I wondered if she was going to go knocking on the Langstons’ door. Over dinner she’d quizzed me thoroughly on how Moira and Morgan were doing at school and I could tell that she still missed them keenly. “I’ll be back Sunday evening to collect me skin. Rònan made me promise him that I would return to the sea before the full moon turns,” she said apologetically.

I nodded, completely understanding that Rònan might be a little gun-shy of his wife walking as a woman on land for an entire moon cycle, given what had happened the last time. “Thank you for trusting us with your skin,” I said quietly. 

“Och, if I can’t trust Harry Potter, who can I trust?” she said with a brilliant smile. A moment later she was out the door and it was just Ginny and me in the apartment.

We stood in front of the door, looking at each other as if we had just met at a party. I felt a strange sort of trembling in my stomach, a feeling I remembered from when she’d Apparated into my flat after a bad date and decided that we’d start practicing together. I thought back to that night, grateful beyond belief that my cluelessness hadn’t put her off me completely.

“So,” she said breathlessly, spreading her hands wide. “Shall we?”

“Lead the way,” I said, feeling a bit breathless myself. She quirked her eyebrow at me and turned, marching determinedly to the bedroom. I watched her go and when she was halfway there, I ran toward her, making her shriek and run into the bedroom where I tackled her onto the luxurious skin on our bed. 

“Harry!” she exclaimed amid deep belly laughs I hadn’t heard in what seemed like forever. I jumped onto the bed with her, the fur slick and sensuous against my bare arms. Wanting to feel more of it, I whipped off my tee shirt, completely forgetting about my glasses and nearly sending them across the room. I lay on my back and spread my arms wide, trying to feel as much of the fur on my skin as I could. “What are you doing?” Ginny asked, taking my glasses and setting them carefully on the bedside table.

“This feels amazing! It’s like the cat but a million times better!” I said, briefly wondering where said cat was. He had a habit of wandering in at the most inopportune times. “Come here.” I sat up, pulling Ginny up with me. She had on a well-loved button-down shirt and I briefly entertained the idea of just ripping it open, but I knew she really liked this shirt. Mastering superhuman restraint, I carefully unbuttoned it while she watched me, slowly revealing creamy, freckled skin and the breasts I had been treated to a picture of earlier. 

Pushing the shirt off her shoulders, I kissed her and laid her back down on the bed, smiling at her intake of breath when she made contact between the fur and the sensitive bare skin of her back. “Oh my God,” she said, sweeping the palm of her hand over the fur.

“I know!” I looked down at her, admiring the contrasts of her pale skin and red hair against the rich brown. Feeling as if I was being pulled towards her by an irresistible force, I slowly bent to kiss her, the wild scent of the sealskin seeming to generate a matching wildness in us both and I found myself pushed backwards onto my back as Ginny moved to lie directly on top of me.

My hands on her back made quick work of her bra clasp and her lips briefly left mine as she shifted to remove it, flinging it across the room to send something crashing to the floor. I tried to look and see what it was, but her hand steered my face back to hers and I looked into her eyes, the monster in my chest roaring at the intensity that had been buried for too long. She kissed me again, stealing my breath and I was more than happy to let her control the situation. This was her show, I was just along for the ride. _And what a ride it will be,_ I thought as she shifted down, tracing her tongue down my neck.

“Harry,” she whispered as she dipped her tongue in the hollow of my throat. For a crazy moment, I wondered if I should have shaved before coming to bed, but she didn’t seem to be complaining, so I set the distracting thought aside, focusing on her warm skin against mine. “Harry,” she said again, bring me out of my reverie.

“Hmm?”

She sat up, straddling my hips and I felt my heart speed up at the sight of her bare-breasted with her hair tousled on top of me. “Do we need to be on top of the skin or under it?”

Her question surprised me and I struggled for a moment to process the sudden change of subject. “Umm …”

Ginny looked down at me and chuckled, sweeping my fringe off my forehead. “Poor thing,” she said, leaning forward and pushing her breasts together which only did amazing things for them, “I’ve fried your brain, haven’t I?”

“Can you blame me?” I grinned, reaching up to run my fingers lightly over her nipples, watching them harden.

Looking down at my actions, she rolled her hips against mine. “And now you’re trying to fry mine.” She closed her eyes and rested her hands on my chest, creating the most delicious friction as she let out a sigh. I watched, mesmerized, as she leaned her head back, long red hair cascading down her shoulders as she ground herself against me. Suddenly she gasped out a short “oh!” and gradually slowed her movements to a stop.

“Mission accomplished?” I asked, squeezing her nipples just the way she liked as she leaned down to kiss me deeply.

“Well, one objective is complete,” she murmured, stretching out on top of me again. “You still didn’t answer my question. On top of or under?”

“Hm, well, I think you’re doing just fine on top,” I said, thrusting my hips under her to make her laugh. 

“You have a one-track mind.”

“Can you blame me? What are we here to do, anyway?” Ginny kissed me again, leaving me in no doubt as to exactly what we were there to do. “I dunno,” I shrugged when she released me. “D’you think it makes a difference? All she said was to sleep under it.”

“Well, there’s sleep and then there’s sleep, right?” She looked pensive and I could see that the success or failure of our venture weighed heavily on her. 

I ran my hands up and down her back as I hugged her to me. “Listen, we are going to do so much shagging this weekend that neither one of us is going to be able to see straight. By the time we’re done, this sealskin won’t know what happened to it, yeah?” I kissed her again, gently shifting us so she lay under me. I reached for the sides of the skin, pulling it over the both of us. “There. Now we’re both on top of _and_ under it.”

She smiled up at me and I knew if I had died right then and there I’d have known my life was well-lived. “I love you,” she said quietly, running her fingers through my hair.

“Gray hair and all?”

“Especially the gray hair.” She grinned up at me and gave my perpetually too-long hair a tug, making me think of the way she pulled on my hair when my face was buried between her legs and a ripple of prickles ran down from my scalp all the way to my toes. We were still wearing trousers and I set about fixing that oversight, unwrapping myself from the sealskin enough to wrestle off my jeans and boxers. The relief was indescribable. Ginny lay on the bed, watching me with her hands behind her head.

“Are you expecting a show?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at her expression. She raised her own eyebrow and looked down to her own trousers, raising her hips. “I see.” I tried to draw out taking them off of her, but I really couldn’t stand to wait any longer to see her spread out before me. As usual, the sight did not disappoint and I felt my mouth go dry as I was struck with the realization of what we were about to try and do.

She sat up, putting her arms around my neck to draw me close to her, resting her forehead against mine. “All right?” she asked.

“Yeah,” I said, managing a swallow. “You?” She nodded, leaning in for a kiss, trailing her hand down my chest and stomach to my hard cock, wrapping her hand around it and moving up and down excruciatingly slowly. I felt that trembling in my belly again as we continued to kiss, her hand stroking my cock. “Gin, you keep that up and I’m going to get into trouble with Marella,” I said, grinning against her lips.

“How is she going to know?” Ginny asked, slowing her movements.

I ran the tip of my finger down her body until I reached her center, inhaling a breath at her wetness. “Who knows what she can smell on us? She could probably tell what we had for dinner last Thursday.” I curled my fingers inside her, skating my thumb over her clit, a surge of pride running through me at her gasp.

Never one to back down from a challenge, she grasped my cock tighter and increased her pace. “You think she’ll be able to tell I wanked you off?”

“Do you really want to find out?” I was starting to breathe a bit harder and I took her hand off of me. As great as it felt after a week of enduring my wife’s renewed flirtiness and not being able to do a damn thing about it, I was really looking forward to a shag. Lips locked together, I gently lowered her down to the plush fur, groaning into her mouth as she spread her legs for me. 

“Wait!” she gasped, grasping my hips with her knees to keep me from moving forward.

“What?” I asked, looking down with a frown.

“I think we should be under the skin, not on top.”

“Are you serious?” She looked up at me serenely and nodded. “All right,” I grumbled as we made the necessary adjustments to get from on top of the skin to underneath it. After much shifting and wiggling, she was under me once more, hands on my shoulders. “Are you ready?” I asked, lips on her neck. 

“Yes,” she whispered against my ear. 

“Are you sure? If you’re not, we can—” She grabbed my cock again, rubbing the head against her wetness as she rolled her hips.

“Tease,” she said with a breathless laugh. “Shut up and shag me already.”

“Yes ma’am,” I said, allowing her to guide me into her warmth. I let out a deep sigh as we were finally joined, taking a moment to enjoy the feeling of having her completely surrounding me. It didn’t matter that we’d been shagging nearly fifteen years, every time we did it, it was as if she was welcoming me into her for the first time. 

Her hands slid down to my arse and she squeezed, urging me to action and I began to move, the fur sliding against my back and shoulders. We normally didn’t bother with covers when we shagged, but I found myself thinking that if we had covers like this, we’d have to make an exception. Ginny moved underneath me, rocking her hips against mine as I covered her with my body, the heady feeling of our skin sliding together combining with the feeling of the sealskin for an entirely mind blowing sensation. 

Ginny was soon breathing hard, gasps exploding out as I thrust into her, our bodies crashing together. She raised her arms, bracing her hands against the headboard to give her return pushes more power, making me grunt in turn. She shut her eyes tightly and I slowed, worried I was hurting her, but they sprang open and she positively glared at me. “Don’t you dare slow down, Potter,” she growled, continuing to meet my thrusts, “I’m almost there.”

“Pardon me,” I panted, working to obey my lady. A moment later, I felt her inner muscles contract around me and I let out a rather loud groan at the sensation, making her laugh. “Sorry,” I said as I felt my face flame.

Wrapping her arms around me, she pulled me close and bit my earlobe, sending a zing straight to my cock. “Make all the damn noise you want,” she whispered, urging me to move again with her hips. Taking that as an invitation, I did. When Teddy was home, we tried to be quiet, unwilling to cast a Silencing Charm in case he needed us, but Teddy wasn’t here to give us odd looks in the morning. 

The feeling of Ginny’s hands on me, the sound of her voice in my ear, her strong legs wrapped securely around me combined with the lushness of the fur against my back to send me spiraling over the edge and I buried my face in her neck, letting out another loud groan as I had what felt like the most productive orgasm I’d ever had; I wondered if that was part of the magic of the selkie’s skin. I lay on top of her, our skin virtually glued together as I worked to get my breath back, breathing deeply of the scents of the sea and our lovemaking. I shifted to lie next to her, but she held onto me. “No,” she whispered as she kissed me, “stay.”

“I’m too heavy for you,” I protested, nuzzling her neck.

“But you feel wonderful,” she purred, scratching her nails up and down my sweaty back. As a compromise, I shifted us onto our sides, hitching her leg up over my hip as I softened inside of her. Lying there with her, sharing touches and kisses, I felt a wonderful lassitude come over me. All of the months of stress and worry that I hadn’t really even fully realized I’d been carrying around just drained away, replaced by a feeling of true peace and I felt my eyes slip closed. 

Dimly, I felt Ginny leave the bed to use the bathroom and come back, curling up next to me and covering up both of us with the sealskin. I fell asleep with her lips on the back of my neck, her soft voice telling me how much she loved me.

Sunday morning sunlight stabbed me in the eye through a crack in the curtains and I shifted around, trying to get away from it. I heard a crackling sound and I frowned, reaching down by my feet and coming up with the wrapper for a protein bar. 

“What’s that?” Ginny mumbled, squinting at me with sleepy eyes. 

“A protein bar wrapper,” I said, tossing it over my shoulder to the floor where it joined the others. 

“Ugh,” she groaned, turning over and pulling the sealskin over her head. “Here’s another one,” she said a moment later, tossing a crumpled ball at me. 

My mouth felt like it was full of sand and I reached for the half-drunk bottle of fruit punch-flavored sports drink on the bedside table, finishing it in long gulps, shuddering at the aftertaste. “Is there any left?” Ginny asked, poking her head out from under the fur. 

“No, sorry. Tea?”

“Oh, God. Yes, please. And an omelette with loads of cheese. And potatoes. And bacon. And toast. Do we have any bagels?”

“Mmm, no bagels. Shall I go get some?”

“No, then who would cook my eggs?” She gave a luxurious stretch, allowing the fur to slide below her breasts. “Is that me?” she asked, wrinkling her nose. “Ooof. I’ll be in the shower.”

“Need anyone to scrub your back?” I asked hopefully, watching as she carefully got out of bed. If she was feeling anything like I was, she was very sore indeed.

“Eggs. Ready by the time I get out,” she said over her shoulder, closing the bathroom door firmly after Stuart scooted in after her.

***  
The steaming hot shower felt wonderful, especially on my tender lady-bits and I was loath to get out, but the thought of something other than protein bars and pizza was too tempting. Deciding that it was unlikely that we were leaving the house today, I dressed in an old tee shirt of Harry’s and my comfiest pajama bottoms, eschewing knickers for the time being. I saw that Harry had done some cleanup in the bedroom and made the bed, the rich brown sealskin laying neatly on top. Giving in to temptation, I lay down on it with Stuart, both of us basking in the wonderfulness of it.

I hope this worked, I thought, absently laying a hand on my abdomen before following my nose into the kitchen. Harry stood at the breakfast bar, carefully plating two omelettes, sprinkling more cheese on top of both. He was wearing only trackies and handed me a cup of tea exactly the way I liked it along with a kiss.

“I can’t believe you cooked bacon shirtless,” I said, picking up a piece of said bacon.

“Shield Charm,” he said with a wink, crunching into his own piece.

“Brilliant _and_ sexy,” I said, nudging his bare arm with my elbow. As we sat companionably eating breakfast together, I felt a gradual return to normal life after our Saturday of debauchery. Teddy would be home this afternoon, Marella would be returning to take back her skin and I would be back to the hospital world tomorrow. _Will anything ever be normal again after this weekend?_ I thought as I made another cup of tea. I looked at my husband next to me as he read the gigantic Sunday newspaper and smiled. _A different sort of normal, then._

Sensing my gaze, he turned to me with a questioning look and I shook my head. “Hey,” he said, re-folding the front page of the _Uncanny Examiner,_ “what did Marella whisper to you Friday night? Before she left?”

“Are you sure you want to know?” I asked, arching an eyebrow at him. It hadn’t been anything really, just a sincere wish to have fun with Harry and not worry about the skin, but I rarely passed up an opportunity to tease him. 

“Hmmph,” he grunted and went back to reading his paper. We spent the rest of the day straightening the rest of the apartment up—getting rid of the pizza boxes and straightening up some of the furniture that had gone askew—before Teddy got home from his camping weekend. I did take the opportunity for a nap underneath the sealskin, just for good measure, waking to find Harry curled up next to me. 

“All right?” I asked, stroking the back of my hand down his smooth cheek, glad he’d shaved when he showered earlier. 

“Yeah,” he said, looking pensive.

“What are you thinking?”

“That we can’t give this one back to Andromeda when he gets annoying,” he said with a wide grin. 

“Oh, you know, I didn’t think about that,” I said in mock dismay.

“What have you been thinking about, then?” He reached out a finger and ran it from my cheek down my jaw and neck to my collarbone, pushing the neck of my too-large tee shirt off my shoulder. 

What had I been thinking about? Everything and nothing. I’d spent this weekend trying not to think about getting and actually staying pregnant and failing completely. Even now I had to keep myself from running down to the lab and making a new batch of Pregnancy Detecting Potion, telling myself that it was too early, that fertilization could take three days and then another week or so until implantation. I’d even thought of how I could convince Marella to stay with us for the full moon cycle so we could continue to sleep under the skin, but I knew that wasn’t right. 

Instead, I smiled at him, running my hand over the hair on his flat stomach. “I’ve been thinking that we might have time for one more go,” I said, feeling a tingle down below at the look in his eyes. 

“Funny, I was just thinking that, too.” He gently pushed the cat aside and slid one arm underneath my back, settling the other hand on my breast, kneading gently. Our mouths met, his lips sliding over mine as I granted him access to explore. His hand left my breast, trailing down my ribs before sliding underneath the waistband of my pajama bottoms. He landed the lightest touch on my mound and we heard the front door slam open.

Harry was off of me and in the lounge so fast, it was almost as if he’d Apparated and I heard him greeting Teddy. Flat on my back, I struggled to regain my composure before going out to exclaim over the plants he’d brought back. 

“Duncan’s dad said they’re useful for something, but I don’t remember what for,” he said as he thrust them at me. 

“Hm well oughtn’t you take them to Mrs Jones in Herbology tomorrow?” I said, looking over the half-dead greenery I now held in my hands. It looked like a bundle of weeds and I set it down on the breakfast bar.

Teddy just shrugged and flopped down on the sofa. “What did you guys do this weekend? Mr Sutton taught us how to start a fire without magic or even matches! Boy, Muggles sure do have it hard! Oh, speaking of Muggles, I met a girl called Andrea and she invited me to the Boardwalk next Saturday. Can I go? She thought my accent was ‘totally rad’,” he drawled in an exaggerated California accent.

Harry and Teddy settled into negotiations for a trip to the Boardwalk with this Andrea and I watched them, smiling at their easy banter as we settled down into regular life, Harry and I sharing secret smiles and touches as we made dinner. Just as we were sitting down to eat, there was a knock at the door and Teddy was up to answer it before either Harry or I could stop him. Once again, Marella stood in our doorway, turning Teddy’s hair a shocking pink.

“M-marella,” Teddy stammered, gaping at her like a fish caught on a line. 

“Marella, come in,” I said, joining Teddy at the door to invite her in. “We were just sitting down to dinner. Would you care to join us?”

“That’s a kind offer, but I just came by to pick up something I left when I saw ye last,” she said with a dazzling smile at Teddy.

“Yes, we kept it safe for you. It’s in here,” I said, leading her to the bedroom where the fur was still spread on our bed. I watched as she gathered it to her, burying her nose in it and breathing deeply.

“Ye made excellent use of it,” she whispered conspiratorially with an almost feral grin. She quickly folded it into a square smaller than I thought possible to put in her tote bag and I felt a sense of loss as it disappeared from my sight.

“Marella—” I began, but she took my hands, squeezing them tight.

“No, sweetling, I canna stay for the cycle and it’s sorry I am, but I am needed by me own husband and pups,” she said, sounding genuinely regretful. 

“But what if …?” I said, unable to finish the sentence. _What if it didn’t work?_

She drew me into her warm embrace and I held on tight, breathing deeply of her fresh scent until I felt my panic subside. “I’ll tell ye what. Next full moon I’ll come visit ye so ye may sleep under it again, aye?” She held me at arm’s length, nostrils flaring wide and looking at me critically. “Though I doubt ye’ll need it by then.”

“What? You mean—”

“Shh, sweetling. All in good time.” She stroked her hand down my hair as if she were my very own mother and patted my cheek. “It’s time for me to go. I’ll see ye at the first of the next full moon, aye?”

“Yes.” I hugged her again, taking one last breath of her wildness. “Thank you so much,” I whispered.

“Och, it’s I that should be thankin’ ye. This is the littlest thing I could have possibly done to pay ye back for returning me to my own family and true place.” She glanced toward the dining room where we could hear Harry and Teddy talking quietly. “Make sure ye thank your Harry properly for me, aye?” she said with a wicked glint in her sea green eyes.

“I definitely will,” I said with my own grin and we shared a giggle. Back out in the dining room, Harry stood to see her out and I watched as she hugged him tightly, whispering something that made him turn an interesting shade of red. Teddy watched, open-mouthed as she waved her fingers at him in farewell.

_Just the three of us again,_ I thought as I resumed my seat and took a sip of my water. For a little while longer.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The big day arrives.

“Harry,” Ginny whispered, nudging me awake.

“Wha?” I grunted, squinting at the clock. It was two in the morning.

“It’s time.”

At these words I was instantly awake and sat up, using my wand to turn on the bedroom lamps. “Now?” I asked, grabbing my glasses and looking at Ginny anxiously.

“Well not right this minute, no,” she said with an indulgent smile. “But we should start assembling the troops.”

I blew out a breath and nodded, my stomach feeling like I had a mass of peppermint frogs jumping around inside. “All right. I’m on it.” I got out of bed, pausing to look at Ginny as she got out as well. “Should you be walking around?”

“Harry, I need to pee,” she said, looking at me like I was absolutely barmy. “I’m just starting my labor. The baby’s not going to come shooting out of me, all right?”

“If you say so,” I said, feeling not one iota calmer. She firmly closed the bathroom door behind her and I shook my head. “Right. The troops.” I concentrated and summoned my Patronus, sending three of them out simultaneously. One went to Sarah, one to Molly and Arthur and one went to Ron and Hermione. Ginny’s parents had already been in town for a week, so they were the first to arrive, Sarah right behind them. 

The two women went straight into the bedroom, chattering excitedly and Arthur put his hand on my shoulder reassuringly. “Big day! Things aren’t going to be the same after today,” he said with a big smile.

“They certainly are not,” I said with more bravado than I felt. I saw his eyes straying to the telly; he’d developed quite the fascination with American infomercials and I set him up with what looked like a good one, full of people unable to work a simple can opener.

Almost before I knew it, I had a houseful of people and Teddy had wheedled his way out of school. I had been charged with bringing Ben up from LA and he disappeared into the bedroom with the women, emerging only to ask for coffee, tea and bagels. “Toasted, please with butter.” 

“As my lady wishes,” I said, relieved to have something to do. While I was putting together a tray, Teddy answered another knock on the door to reveal Ron, baby Hugo strapped to his chest and Rose on his hip.

“Ron! Where’s Hermione?” Arthur asked, tearing his attention away from the informercial I’d put on for him to help his son with Rose, settling her on his lap. 

“She’ll be here in a bit. Had to talk over some arrangements for Gryffindor with McGonagall and asked me to come ahead with the kids.” He ambled over to me in the kitchen, grinning widely, the baby on his chest bobbing gently up and down with his steps.

“You look ridiculous,” I said with a grin of my own.

“This is you in six months, mate. Get a good look,” he said with a snort. “How’s she doing?”

“Fine. She’s in there with an army.” I picked up the tray. “Excuse me, I have a delivery of my own.”

Just as he’d said, Hermione showed up just as the sun was coming up, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek as she too disappeared into the bedroom. A little after ten, Ginny emerged, looking radiant as she walked slow laps around the apartment, pausing to kiss Ron and her dad on the cheek. “Thank you for coming,” she said to Ron.

“Of course. How could I pass up an opportunity to see my little sister embarrass herself?” She punched him in the arm and a look of pain crossed her face. “All right?” Ron asked, reaching for her shoulder.

Sarah swooped in, taking her hand. “Contraction?” she asked and Ginny nodded. “All right, I think that’s enough walking around for now. Come on.” I watched as Molly and Sarah ushered her back into the bedroom, feeling like the third wheel. 

Hermione rubbed my arm sympathetically. “She’ll need you soon,” she said. 

“Yeah, you’ll know when she starts yelling and cursing,” Ron said with a grin at Hermione.

“Ron, you know that’s not true. Witches don’t subscribe to that whole “pain in childbirth” notion that some Muggles do,” Hermione chided.

“They don’t?” I asked. That had been one thing I’d been worried about and I wasn’t looking forward to seeing Ginny go through pain that I’d had a hand in creating. 

“No. There’s spell that works like a spinal block. It’s not completely pain free—you can’t put the block in place too early, otherwise it might interfere with dilation of the cervix …” Hermione explained and I let her go on, relieved that Ginny wouldn’t be spending the next however many hours writhing in pain. 

It was getting on to noon and I was just starting to figure out what I was going to feed everyone when there was another knock at the door. Teddy jumped up from the sofa, tearing himself away from Judge Judy that he was watching with Arthur. Opening the door, I saw a man holding two enormous bags and I drew my wand, keeping it below the level of the counter. “Is this the Potter residence?” the man asked, holding up a slip of paper.

“Who wants to know?” Teddy challenged, standing up straighter.

“I have a food delivery for Harry Potter.” He showed Teddy the slip of paper and I relaxed, putting my wand away and joining my godson at the door.

“I’m Harry. I’ll take that, thanks.” I took the two enormous bags he handed me, passing them to Ron and dug in my jeans pocket for a tip. Teddy followed Ron into the kitchen, watching avidly as he took out several covered foil containers. I looked at the slip the delivery man had handed me and saw Juanita’s name on it as the person who’d placed the order. I sent my stag out to her with heartfelt thanks.

“Who’s it from?” Ron asked, taking the lid off of a lasagna.

“Juanita, the history teacher at school.”

“Oh, Ms Okefor sent this? Awesome!” Teddy grabbed a stack of plates and took the cover off of another container, revealing garlic bread. “There’s dessert, too! And salad, gross.” 

“Teddy, go in the bedroom and ask if anyone is hungry, all right?” I said, taking the covers off of what looked like spaghetti with meat sauce and a baked ziti. I sampled some of the red sauce. Eh, not too bad, I suppose. 

Teddy came back a moment later. “Ginny doesn’t want anything, but Sarah wants more coffee, Molly wants more tea and Ben wants another bagel,” he reported, taking a piece of garlic bread. 

“Arthur? Hungry?” I looked over to the sofa and saw Ginny’s dad staring raptly at the telly as Judge Judy read the riot act to one of the litigants. Ron shook his head and made a plate for him, setting it on the coffee table. 

“He’ll notice it eventually,” he said, cramming a piece of garlic bread into his own mouth. 

I put together a tray of refreshments, including a cup of tea for Ginny and carried it into the bedroom, a little nervous of what I might see. Ginny was on the bed, looking relaxed and I could tell that someone had worked an enlarging charm on the room in addition to conjuring up some seating and a small table. 

“Who was at the door, love?” Ginny asked, accepting the cup of tea I handed her, using her belly as a table for the saucer.

“Juanita sent us some food. Lasagna and stuff,” I said, gingerly sitting down on one edge of the bed, afraid to jostle her.

“Oh, that was sweet of her. Did you thank her?”

“Yeah, sent my Patronus.” I swept a few stray hairs behind her ear. “How are you doing?”

“I’m all right. Mum and Sarah think I’ve got a few more hours yet until my water breaks,” she said, taking my hand and squeezing tight, her strength reassuring. 

“The little thing is right where he needs to be and she’s progressing along just fine,” Sarah said confidently, patting Ginny’s other hand. 

“All right then. Um, anything I can do?” 

“Keep an eye on Dad and Ron. Don’t let Dad wander off,” Ginny said with a smile.

“Fat chance. He’s been glued to the telly all day.”

Molly snorted in irritation. “That thing. It’s going to ruin his eyes! Tell him I said that we’re not getting one.”

“He knows, Mum,” Ginny said with an air of a long-standing argument. “Besides, you don’t even have electricity. How would he get it to work?”

“Your father made a car fly. He’d find a way,” Molly said grimly, casting a glance at the bedroom door. 

Ginny sucked in a breath just then and the hand that was holding mine clamped down, grinding my knuckles together. Everyone in the room immediately focused on her, holding their breaths until her face cleared and she relaxed once more. “That was a good one,” she said, a little out of breath. 

Sarah traded a shrewd look with Molly and set her coffee aside. “Let’s have a look at you,” she said and without any further preamble, whipped out a small bottle of lube, flipped up the bottom of Ginny’s nightdress and stuck her fingers right up into her. I looked at Ben with wide eyes and he just shrugged, taking it all in stride as he ate his bagel. Frowning in concentration, Sarah finally nodded and withdrew, pulling the nightdress down and patting Ginny’s huge belly. “Won’t be long now.”

Hermione came back into the room, balancing Hugo on one hip and cup of tea in her other hand. “Did I miss anything?”

“Not yet, dear. Her water should break soon,” Molly said, reaching out for her grandson while Hermione settled herself on another chair. Hugo looked as if he’d gotten almost entirely Weasley genes with a shock of red hair and not for the first time, I wondered what my soon-to-be-born child would look like. One night for fun, Ginny had shown me our chances for red or black hair and green or brown eyes with Punnet squares. Chances were high for a brown-eyed child, but I was hoping for green or hazel.

The mention of water breaking seemed to kick off a discussion among the women about their own birthing experiences as we whiled away the hours of waiting. Ginny seemed disinclined for me to leave, so I listened to stories about women who furiously cleaned house practically up until the very second they gave birth, about babies that were born with full sets of teeth and surprise twins.

“And I said to Arthur, ‘I think there’s another one in there!’ and he turned white as a sheet! We’d planned on stretching things for one more, not two.” Molly chuckled fondly and shook her head. I wondered which one was the unexpected twin, but I didn’t want to ask in case it was Fred. 

Ginny listened, occasionally volunteering something from one of the several witches she’d midwifed for, but for the most part her focus was inward, concentrating on things only she could feel. I glanced over at Hermione and then quickly away, embarrassed to have seen her in the middle of breastfeeding Hugo. 

“Get used to it, Harry,” she said as she handed the baby to Ben and got herself back in order.

“Yeah,” Ginny said, grinning at me, “they’re not just your playthings anymore.” The entire room burst out into laughter and I felt like I was positively glowing red. All I wanted to do was disappear and for a split-second I did consider Disapparating out of the room, but then Ginny squeezed my hand again and made a short “Oh!” sound. 

“I think that’s done it,” Sarah said, pushing up Ginny’s nightdress again. There on the absorbent cloth underneath her was a puddle of pinkish fluid quickly soaking in. Everyone in the room held their breath for a moment and then sprang into action. 

Hermione took Hugo from Ben and left the room, returning a moment later without him. Molly helped Ginny lean forward while Sarah quietly murmured a spell directed at her lower back, putting in place the pain relief Hermione had mentioned earlier. Immediately the lines of discomfort faded from Ginny’s face and I breathed a sigh of relief. Once again Sarah stuck her fingers up inside of my wife and nodded. 

“Nearly fully dilated. Almost time to push,” she said and Ginny nodded, suddenly all business. 

“Get this off me,” she said, raising her arms. Hermione helped her pull off the nightdress, leaving her completely naked, something I definitely didn’t expect. 

“Should I …?” I said, feeling utterly superfluous. 

“No, you stay,” Ginny said, grabbing on to my arm.

“You’re going to help her push,” Molly said with a warm smile.

“Uh … all right.” When we’d talked about her giving birth previously, she’d said as much, but I assumed it would be in the form of cheering her on like I’d seen on the telly. This seemed like it was shaping up to be much different. 

Ben bent over us, putting a cool cloth on Ginny’s forehead and I thought about asking for one for myself. It felt like the temperature in the room had shot up and the sweat was pouring off the both of us. My shirt was sticking to me uncomfortably, so I took it off, moving behind Ginny so she could lean more comfortably against me. This was apparently the right thing to do because Sarah smiled and nodded at me in approval. 

Before too long, Ginny was breathing like a steam engine as I held her in my arms, feeling the strength running through her body as she began to push. Hermione and Molly each held a hand, murmuring encouragement as Ginny expended a prodigious amount of effort with each push, leaning back against me after each one. 

Sarah was keenly focused on what was going on between Ginny’s legs, coaching her on when to push and relax while Ben hovered over her shoulder, eyes narrowed. “All right, up you go,” she said after a particularly long push drew a long grunt of effort from Ginny. Molly and Hermione helped her into more of a squatting position and I realized someone had done something to the surface of the bed as it wasn’t nearly as squashy as it normally was.

“Harry, get behind her and support her,” Sarah directed, maneuvering me so that I was on my knees behind Ginny, holding her up with my upper body, arms wrapped securely around her. “All right love, just a few more pushes.”

Ginny gave a short nod and I felt her gather herself, waiting for the next contraction. My hands were on her belly and I felt it move through her like a wave and my breath caught in my throat when she started to push with it, a long, loud groan tearing out of her throat. The sound of it raised the hair on the back of my neck and I shivered. “That’s a good girl, we can see the top of the head.” 

Hermione looked up at me and grinned, mouthing “Black hair!” at me and I felt a flash of joy. Another series of contractions and low, primal cries from Ginny and our son was born. Black-haired, pink-skinned and crying his outrage at being so forcefully evicted from his cozy home. Exhausted from the herculean effort she’d just expended, Ginny collapsed against me and I held her tight, so overcome with emotion I could only stare as Ben performed a quick examination before placing the squalling creature on Ginny’s chest. 

If you had asked me the previous week if I believed in love at first sight, I would have laughed in your face, but one look at him was all it took for me to fall hopelessly, irrevocably in love. I looked at my wife, seeing the adoration and wonder I felt mirrored in her eyes as she gently stroked a finger down his cheek as he continued to howl his indignity at his current situation. My heart thumped in my chest as I enfolded them both in my arms, knowing that it beat for them.

Hours later, I stood in front of one of our picture windows that faced the Golden Gate Bridge, holding my clean and surprisingly quiet son. The lights of the bridge glowed in the darkness, reminding me of that night Marella had first brought her sealskin to us. I looked down at the sleeping face. _Was that the night?_ I wondered, kissing his forehead.

“Bless,” Ron said softly and I glanced up at him, feeling a warm glow of friendship at the look in his eyes. He was standing next to us, enjoying his third celebratory Lagavulin of the day. “I guess you and Ginny sorted out your difficulties?” he said, nodding to the baby in my arms.

“Well, we had a bit of help …”

***  
It was a rare sunny March day, but the wind off the water was still relentless and I pulled my coat tighter around my son, held securely in his sling against my chest. “All right?” Harry asked beside me, burrowed into his own dragonhide jacket.

“Fine. He’s snug as a bug in there,” I said, holding out the collar of my jacket enough so he could see the sleeping baby nestled against me. He leaned over and gave me a kiss, taking my hand as we started the hike down to the ruins of the bath.

“Here?” he asked as we walked out onto the concrete peninsula that stuck out into the largest pool. 

“Yeah,” I said, carefully lowering myself to the cold concrete. 

He sat down next to me, looking out at the open water and the seal-covered rock, the wind making his already untidy hair truly tragic. “How do they get from there to here?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never managed to figure out the trick of it. Maybe they have their own sort of Apparating?” Harry shrugged and peeked inside my jacket again, putting his arm around my shoulders. 

“So you just call her?”

“Yeah. That’s what I did last time.” I closed my eyes and visualized Marella, both the woman and the seal. Her wild brown hair a counterpoint to her sleek seal fur. “Marella,” I called softly, “it’s Ginny Weasley. I have someone I’d like you to meet.”

“Weasley?” Harry snorted softly, kissing my temple.

I shrugged. “It’s how she knows me.” We fell silent as we waited for the selkie to make her appearance. The baby shifted in his warm nest and I looked down to check on him, falling in love with him all over again as I seemed to every time I looked at him. The circus in our home had finally packed up and left town with Mum and Dad going home two days ago. I felt rather proud that I’d managed to hold things together for two whole days all by myself. Whether or not I’d make it a third day remained to be seen.

Ben had made me promise to have Harry come and get him if I needed him. “Honey, if that baby so much as sneezes, I expect to see Harry at my door, all right?”

“Pardon me, Dr Frye, but I am a fully-qualified doctor myself and I think I can handle a baby’s sneezes,” I’d said to him, giving him a haughty glare, only slightly spoiled by the baby at my breast. 

Sarah also made sure that I knew she was available for me to call on. “Even if you want to get away for a few hours,” she said, looking at me seriously. “You’re still a person that needs time to herself and I am more than happy to watch him.” Her offer was incredibly generous and even though I couldn’t imagine spending time away from my son right now, I knew that one day I would. 

I heard a splash and opened my eyes, smiling to see Marella’s whiskered seal face bobbing in front of me. “It’s a beautiful day to be seein’ ye, Ginny Weasley. And ye’ve brought your Harry, too!” she said warmly, giving us a happy seal smile.

“Hello, Marella! I have someone I’d like you to meet.” I carefully unzipped my jacket, exposing the sling wrapped securely around my chest. Leaning forward, I pulled down the brightly-colored fabric, showing her the baby’s face. “Marella, this is James.”

“Oh, my sweetling,” she breathed softly, swimming up as close as she could, her dark eyes taking in every detail of his sleeping face. “He’s as beautiful as this sunny day.”

Another head popped up next to her, this one a mottled gray with far more whiskers. “Aye, wife! Is this the wee one ye went through all the trouble for?” Rònan said with his usual bluster. He peered closely at James, cocking one bristly seal eyebrow. “I suppose he’ll do well enough,” he said, his grudging tone belied by his pleased grin. 

Marella smacked him on the shoulder with her flipper. “Rònan, ye should be ashamed of yourself to be sayin’ such things about the wee babe!” She looked at me apologetically, her expression clearly saying “Men!” “He’s as beautiful as I knew he would be. Ye should tuck him away now; it’s too cold out here for him to be exposed like that.” I took her advice and drew the fabric back up, refastening my jacket.

“Ginny Weasley, me lady wife has the right of it. He’s a bonny wee lad and I wish ye both the joy of him,” Rònan said with a bobbing seal bow. “He’ll surely look better once he gets a bit o’fur on him!” Next to me, Harry snorted and shook his head. 

“Hush! Speaking of lads, where are ours?” As she spoke, two more seal heads, one brown, one mottled gray popped up beside her, the mottled gray one blowing a mouthful of spray at her. “Och, Kirwin! Ye wee devil!” Marella exclaimed, shaking her head. “Dorran, can’t ye keep your brother in line?” The brown one, Dorran, I presumed, simply shrugged and ducked his head back under water, swimming through the still waters like an arrow.

Marella simply shook her head and looked back at me, the universal exasperated expression of mums everywhere evident on her face. “They’re beautiful,” I said, watching as the two pups zipped around the pool. 

“I thank you for your kindness. They’re a handful, impatient for the first time they can shed their skins. It can’t come soon enough for them,” she said, piquing my curiosity. I felt Harry shift around a little and knew he was intrigued as well. She turned back to us and there was a kindness in her eyes. “Despite what my husband says, it was no trouble at all. When I think of how you saved me and returned me to where I belong …” 

Held captive by a grieving man to take care of the children his wife had left behind by her passing, too deep in mourning to realize what he was demanding from the creature as he kept her separated from the skin that would allow her to return to the sea. I shuddered at the thought Marella’s magic slowly fading away the longer and longer she was kept away from an essential part of herself. She’d more than repaid us, returning at each full moon for the first trimester, allowing us to sleep under her skin to make sure James stayed where he belonged. 

“Well now we’re even,” I said stoutly, wishing she had a hand to shake. 

“Aye, that we are,” she agreed, giving a short seal nod. She looked at Harry and me in front of her. “But don’t hesitate to ask if you should need some assistance in the future,” she said with a saucy grin. 

“Wife, what if they want to use my skin next time?” Rònan said, giving a sharp bark of laughter. 

“Och, ye’ll use any excuse to get to Ginny, won’t ye?”

“Not with the look her husband is giving me right now!” Rònan slapped the water and gave another bark of laughter. “Aye, Harry! Ye have nothing to fear from me. This one is more than enough!”

“I think we’ll both hold you to that, yeah?” he said mildly, squeezing my hand. 

Marella and I shared a look and shook our heads. “Listen, I wanted you to meet James and thank you again for all of your help. We can already tell that he loves the water. Whenever he starts to fuss, a bath calms him right down.” 

“Aye, d’ye think he might use the wand ye had made from my husband’s whisker?” she asked with interest. One night I’d shown her the three wands and told her the story about the water horse and the thunderbird. She’d been very impressed that we thought highly enough of selkies to have a wand made from the whisker of one. 

“The wand chooses the wizard, so we won’t know for a while. I’ll definitely let you know.” Privately, I thought chances were high for that wand choosing him.

“Just think! That little bit o’meself castin’ spells all over the world!” Rònan boasted. “Wait until that Gwalchmai hears about this! Ye’ll have selkies bringin’ ye whiskers all day, just beggin’ to be made into wands!”

“Ye’ve both done well. He’ll grow up strong and true, just like the both of ye,” Marella said fondly, eyes looking at the lump under my jacket. “It’s time ye got back to someplace warm and out of this wind, aye?”

“Yes, it’s a bit blustery out here today,” I said, shifting around on the cold concrete. Why did I never remember to cast a Cushioning Charm before I sat down? _Some witch I am._

“Thank you again, Marella,” Harry said sincerely as he stood up, stamping his feet to get the blood flowing again.

The selkie accepted his thanks with a bob of her head and in the blink of an eye, all four of them disappeared underneath the water of the still pool, reappearing a moment later out in the open ocean. 

Harry helped me stand up and we looked out to sea, the wind blowing our hair back as he put his arm around me. The warmth of the baby under my jacket and Harry’s arm around my shoulders anchored me and I felt like everything was going to be all right. We’d muddle through and figure out how to balance a teenager, a baby and two careers. 

“We’d better get back. Teddy’s liable to have burned down the house by now,” Harry murmured.

“Duncan’s there. He’ll keep an eye on him.”

“Duncan’s worse,” he snorted, taking my hand and leading back toward the trail that led to the car park.

“That’s true,” I said, squeezing his hand as we started up the trail together.


End file.
